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154 Construction Jokes That Are The Real Brick And Mortar Of Entertainment
Funny,JokesSEP 23, 2022

154 Construction Jokes That Are The Real Brick And Mortar Of Entertainment

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Construction, in its broadest sense, refers to the act of building something. That description isn’t really specific, right? And what comes when a term is described in a non-specific way? It creates space for hilarious interpretations and funny leeways, as if construction work wasn’t already a suspiciously funny topic. Combine that quirky elbow room of interpretation with building a house, and you’ll have some of the best funny construction jokes ever. 
Yup, we’re talking about construction memes, puns, one-liners, and even dirty construction jokes that will leave you wondering how on Earth you’ve spent your life without them. Of course, these funny construction puns and jokes wouldn’t be as charming without the main element here—the workers. These dudes and gals either seem to be in a terribly foul mood or merry and without any worry. It’s only ever one of these feelings; have you ever seen a construction worker displaying any other emotions? Neither have we. But that’s exactly why these contractor memes and construction jokes are so hilarious—it’s the human factor! 
If you deem yourself to be a real connoisseur of written entertainment, some of these bits also fall into the construction dad jokes category. If you were to ask us, these are the absolute best kinds of jokes. Get ready to read these glorious, funny, and dirty construction jokes. They will surely squeeze a giggle or two out of you, so give the best jokes your vote! Don’t forget to share this article with your friends who might need some cheering up today.

#1 Nailed the Pun, Seriously

Not all construction work is equally enjoyable.
For instance, drilling a large hole is boring, but fastening two pieces of metal together is riveting.
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28points

#2 When Your Past Won’t Stay Put

When Your Past Won’t Stay Put
"Sometimes I look out over the new construction in my city, old ground being dug up to make room for the new, and I think to myself, I really should have buried the bodies somewhere else."
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24points

#3 Minnesota’s Real Fourth Season

Minnesota has 4 seasons.
Almost winter, winter, almost summer, and road construction.
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21points

#4 Classic dad joke energy

"You guys wanna hear a construction joke? Hold on, I'm working on it."
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21points

#5 Well, that escalated quickly

Well, that escalated quickly
"I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job at the construction site... But when I got home, all the signs were there."
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20points

#6 Plot twist: It’s the neighbor finger

A construction worker comes home from work.
He tells his wife, "Honey, I cut off my finger today."
She replies, "The whole finger!?"
He says, "No, the one right next to it."
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18points

#7 Lightweight but always standing tall

While constructing a house, which building has the least weight?
It most definitely is a lighthouse!
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16points

#8 Guess He Took “Blank” Literally

"I told my carpenter I didn’t want carpeted steps. He gave me a blank stair."
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16points

#9 Guess That Job’s For a Crane

Guess That Job’s For a Crane
What kind of bird works on a construction site?
A Crane.
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15points

#10 Still Building to Funny

Why did the constructor shy away from making construction jokes?
Because the joke still needed some work!
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15points

What Are the Biggest Construction Fails?

Construction memes and jokes are hilarious because they play on well-known facts and some stereotypes about builders. Even though there are many great contractors, some careless workers will still make a name for themselves. Yep, we’re talking about construction fails, and their insane effects on society. Here are a few of the worst construction fails that happened on a large scale!

Tacoma Narrows Bridge

The Tacoma Narrows Bridge was constructed in 1940 and was the first cable suspension bridge and the third-largest suspension bridge in the US at that time. Just after its construction, it was found to dangerously buckle and sway during windy conditions. Even with normal winds, the bridge would undulate noticeably. And just four months later, 40mph winds caused it to collapse! Luckily, not a single person was killed, and its collapse influenced how future bridges were built and how engineers approached bridge aerodynamics.

Vdara Hotel and Spa

The Vdara Hotel and Spa was opened in December 2009. Unfortunately, just a year later, this hotel’s construction created problems when it was discovered to be a ‘death ray.’ The hotel was designed with a unique, curved structure that collected solar rays and beamed them to the hotel’s swimming pool area. Guests who were sunbathing ended up with singed hair, and one person’s plastic bag melted! Even though there are funny construction worker memes, these terrifying construction fails will make you rethink the structures around you.

The Leaning Tower of Pisa

Tourists love the Leaning Tower of Pisa because they can take funny pictures with it. But this tower is quite a fantastic construction failure in action. The building gets its weird design from a shoddy foundation built on soil with no load-bearing abilities. At the time of construction, when the tilt was noticed, the upper floors were created to make them taller on one side, resulting in its curved structure.

#11 That’s one cool way to pave it

That’s one cool way to pave it
How does one construct a road at the artic pole?
One must use snow cones!
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14points

#12 Shockingly Bad Wiring Skills

How do people react when they see a lousy electrician?
They usually are very shocked!
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14points

#13 Winter and Construction: The Only Real Midwest Seasons

Which seasons are the most distinct in the Midwest?
Two seasons are most distinct — winter and construction!
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14points

#14 Honestly, Brutal but Helpful

What kind of criticism do architectural critics give?
They give constructive criticism.
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14points

#15 No one wants a window pun break-up

Never tell a window a joke.
You don't want to make it crack up.
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14points

#16 Gave “Building Dreams” a Whole New Meaning

Gave “Building Dreams” a Whole New Meaning
"I was offered a construction job in Egypt this morning. Turned out to be a pyramid scheme."
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13points

#17 When shovels outsmart layoffs

"My city just fired half of the city's construction workers... Apparently they realized a shovel can stand-up on it's own."
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13points

#18 Puns on point, dad’s career glow-up

"My dad gave up his job of being a late-night radio DJ. He took up a new job as a railway construction worker. Talk about a career change, but I guess he just couldn't give up his love for laying tracks."
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13points

#19 Building Up to “I Do”

Why did it take so long for the construction worker to propose?
He was building up to it.
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13points

#20 That’s some serious layering advice

Why did the painter come to work wearing two jackets on a sunny day?
Because the head constructor advised him to always put two coats!
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13points
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