Statistics say that around 30 to 40% of the world’s population drink coffee. That’s actually a lot of people. In some countries, these numbers go even higher. It’s safe to assume that coffee is an important part of human life. So of course, we make jokes about it.
With the variety of beans, brewing methods, and coffee-based drinks, making coffee puns is easier than ordering a cup at your favorite coffee shop. For example, I am sure you have heard the depresso joke. It’s a very funny roast (see what I did there?) on people who are grumpy and irritable even after they’ve had their morning coffee.
If you think that coffee humor is only for those who actually drink it, you should just look up some jokes about coffee. Trust me, they will make you chuckle under your breath or even laugh out loud even if you have never as much as tried this fantastic liquid (by the way, if that’s your case, how do you survive?)
Whether you prefer your coffee black, white, with or without sugar, hot or iced, it will always go well with a nice fresh coffee joke. In this article we’ve collected a lot of funny coffee jokes to brighten up your morning. How many cups do you drink per day? Tell us in the comments, and don’t forget to share your favorite ways of having coffee.
#1
"I tried brewing my coffee with Red Bull instead of water. I drank it and left my house to go to work. After 15 minutes I realized I forgot my car."
unknown
Report20points
#2
"Every morning, I see this exhausted woman who looks like she would murder someone for a cup of coffee. I really should move that mirror."
unknown
Report17points
#3
What does a gossiping coffee do?
Spill the beans.
unknown
Report15points
#4
What kind of sugar does Lady Gaga use in her coffee?
Raw raw raw raw raw.
unknown
Report15points
#5
New word: Procaffeinating (n). - the tendency to not start anything until you’ve had your coffee.
unknown
Report15points
#6
What currency can we use to buy coffee in space?
Starbucks.
unknown
Report15points
#7
How does a coffee snob take their coffee?
Seriously. Very seriously.
unknown
Report14points
#8
What do you call sad coffee?
Despresso.
unknown
Report14points
#9
What type of coffee do vampires drink?
Decoffinated.
unknown
Report14points
#10
Why was the instant cup of coffee so rude?
He had no filter.
unknown
Report14points
#11
What did the cup of coffee say to his friend?
"What’s up, brew?"
unknown
Report14points
#12
How did the hipster burn their mouth?
They drank their coffee before it was cool.
unknown
Report13points
#13
What’s a barista’s favorite exercise?
The French press.
unknown
Report13points
#14
What did the coffee addict say to his doctor?
"I don’t have a problem with coffee; I have a problem without it!"
unknown
Report13points
#15
What's it called when you steal someone's coffee?
Mugging!
unknown
Report13points
#16
Coffee is the most important meal of the day.
unknown
Report13points
#17
What does a coffee lover say when they’re hitting on you?
I’ve been thinking about you a latte.
unknown
Report13points
#18
How do coffee cups greet each other?
With mugs and kisses.
unknown
Report13points
#19
What’s a coffee’s favorite spell?
Espresso Patronum!
unknown
Report13points
#20
What do you call it when you drop your coffee mug?
A coffee break.
unknown
Report13points