Ask any single mom of young kids whether its a breezy walk in the park juggling parenting and work or studies... It's likely many will say "absolutely not!" Childcare doesn't come cheap, not everyone has family or friends that can help out, and let's be honest, even child-free people can get tired after a long day at the office, or a night in front of the books.
An annoyed child-free man reached the end of his rope when his classmate decided to bring her loud toddler to college. The kid spent the lecture dashing around the room, disrupting students who were trying to complete their thesis. To make matters worse, the mom expected the guy to keep an eye on her kid when she left the room. He's livid and feels her actions were totally inappropriate. Bored Panda had an extensive chat with him to find out more. We also reached out to Lisa Smith, parenting coach and founder of The Peaceful Parent, for her take on the matter.
Despite falling pregnant as a teen, this mom decided to pursue her education and study towards a degree
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
But she did it at the expense of her classmates, who had to tolerate her 3-year-old running wild during a lecture
Image credits: RDNE Stock project/Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: heyitskevin1
"The mom should have found childcare or stayed home with her kid," student tells Bored Panda
Image credits: Anastasia Shuraeva/Pexels (not the actual photo)
Bored Panda managed to get hold of the aggrieved student who is still livid about the whole situation. He said he wasn't planning to take the matter further but he's changed his mind and will be addressing it with those "higher up" in the college. "I'm sick of class being disruptive, or being policed how I am able to talk," he told us.
"Nobody said anything, but everybody had the same cringe face," he replied, when asked how the other students reacted. "Nobody looked thrilled but I could be wrong."
The student believes the mom should have found childcare or stayed home with her kid. "Her kid is old enough to be in pre-school," he explained. "I understand these things cost money but when you choose to have a child you have to make sacrifice in life. If she can't afford it she should stay home to watch her child."
He told us that he's not against single moms getting an education. "However, this girl hasn't been to majority of classes, and today she walked in with her kid for the last 30 minutes of an hour-and-30-minute class, so she was just a distraction for the last 30 minutes, and didn't learn anything resourceful for the class. What was the point of dragging the kid here again?" he questioned.
The guy added that he's never experiences something like this at college before. "This may be due to my major. Because of my biochemistry major, I am usually in a lab with chemicals like chloroform or acids or deadly parasites like plasmodium falciparum," he told us. "A child wouldn't fly in this environment. Maybe they are more lax in the social sciences."
Children deserve to be children, he told Bored Panda. "You wanted/had a kid, now its time to be a big boy/girl and be a responsible parent," added the student. "Your kid is not the responsibility of others. Your kid is not instantly allowed access to all spaces because you view them as an extension of yourself."
The students says he understands that life is hard for people from all walks of life, and having a child adds more strain because of the added responsibility. "Nobody is arguing against that," he told us. "What I am arguing is your lack of preparedness should not punish others."
He says it's particularly troubling given the content that is discussed in the class. "I don't want to dissect songs saying they want to 'ride the jailer down while sloppy drunk' with a 3-year-old running around with Cocomelon blasting from an iPad," he explained. "I shouldn't have to censor myself in this space."
The student, clearly still super frustrated, reiterated that the context and setting is important. "If I was at my job when I taught babies to 12-year-olds how to swim? Obviously that is not appropriate and I would be in the wrong," he told us. "Nobody wants to be a d*ck to you or your kid, but you force people's hand when you act entitled like this lady did."
His final words before returning to his books: "College is not a place for your kid unless specified otherwise. Its disrespectful."
"Sitting still for even 10–15 minutes is a stretch for many toddlers": an expert weighs in
Image credits: Brett Sayles/Pexels (not the actual photo)
It’s not developmentally realistic to expect a 3-year-old to sit still and stay quiet for long periods. That's according to parenting coach and founder of The Peaceful Parent, Lisa Smith. She says very young children are wired to move, explore, and make noise—it’s how they learn and process the world.
"Sitting still for even 10–15 minutes is a stretch for many toddlers," Smith told Bored Panda during our interview. "Expecting silence and stillness in an adult-centered environment like a classroom sets both the child and the parent up for frustration. It's not bad behavior—it's a sign that the child is being asked to meet adult expectations they aren't yet neurologically or emotionally capable of fulfilling."
When childcare isn’t available, it’s about creatively managing a nearly impossible situation, says Smith. "One option is collaborating with other student parents to create a rotating care network. Colleges can also play a huge role here—offering on-campus childcare, kid-friendly study spaces, or remote learning options."
The expert says there might be times a mom has to bring her child to class. In this case, she believes the community should meet her with empathy, not judgment. "That child isn't a distraction—they're evidence of a mom doing everything in her power to build a better life," the expert said. "Support can look like offering help, not eye-rolls."
Smith says it's normal for little children to run around. And it's not just a case of burning off energy. "Kids running wild are often signaling unmet needs. Movement is one, but so is emotional release, sensory input, or connection," she told us. "A child who’s been cooped up, overstimulated, or ignored might express that through big, loud, physical play. The answer isn't always discipline—it’s prevention."
The parenting coach says it's important to make sure little ones have time to move, space to feel, and opportunities to connect. "They’re not 'naughty'—they’re human," she says, "With a nervous system that’s still under construction."
Research shows that only 8% of single mothers who attend a community college will graduate
Deciding to attend college as a young single mom is a big step. But many women are brave enough to do it. Research shows that 21% of women in community college are single mothers, compared with 7 percent of women in four-year institutions.
Unfortunately, the stats also reveal that, despite their best intentions, most single moms won't leave with a degree in hand. They face many obstacles and often get little support. Finances to fund their studies is an obvious one.
Money doesn't grow on trees, as some kids would like to believe. And many moms not only have to pay their way through college, but also support themselves and their child or children. Some must also pay their children's school fees. This might mean taking on several jobs, sacrificing time and sleep, or getting into debt.
Then there's the issue of childcare. Young children require constant supervision, and this often means paying someone to look after the kid(s) while mom is at work or in school. Some colleges provide childcare on campus; some don't.
"Instructors themselves can help lessen this challenge for their students by making accommodations and modifications for parents that allow them to juggle their parenting duties and their coursework," notes Study.com. "Examples include allowing children in the class and developing family-friendly syllabus policies." But of course, that won't always work for the child-free students in class, especially when the children are loud or disruptive. Hence, the man's online rant.
How to manage working or studying as a single mom
As the guy rightfully noted, online classes are an option. Many higher education institutions offer courses and degree programs that you don't have to attend in-person. "These are the best choice for single parents (as long as they are accredited), because they allow the ultimate flexibility," notes Study.com. "More importantly, online courses and programs allow single parents to learn at home and access all their course materials online. This saves money by avoiding food, supplies, parking, and gas costs."
The site adds that course materials are also likely to be cheaper because they are in e-book format. "While online learning is not for everyone, single parents who thrive online have the added bonus of networking with other single parents," reads the site.
Part-time programs are another option. They allow a level of flexibility, so that single moms can juggle their studies, parenting responsibilities, and work a little easier. "The only downfall here is that it will take longer to get a degree," cautions Study.com.
But there are other pros... "Part-time students can attend two or more classes a week, which frees up their childcare schedule. They also tend not to amass debt in the same manner as their full-time peers, because they are paying smaller chunks at a time," adds the site. Again, always make sure the course or degree you're doing is accredited.
Smith says for single moms working or studying from home, structure is everything—but it needs to be flexible. "A realistic routine might include short, focused work bursts (25–45 minutes) during which the child is engaged in independent, safe play—like a sensory bin, play-dough, or audio books with simple toys. Follow that with quality connection time," the expert told Bored Panda.
She says that toddlers often “act out” when they feel emotionally disconnected, so even 10 minutes of full presence can go a long way. "Rotate toys weekly to keep them fresh, and use visual schedules or timers to help toddlers know what to expect," advised Smith. "But the most important thing? Let go of perfection. Some days will feel chaotic, and that doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong."
People advised the student to escalate the matter and speak to the professor
"Professor chiming in. This is absolutely absurd": many felt the mom was out of line
Some people were more interested in hearing more about the guy's thesis
