#1
Bored Panda was very curious to learn about the gap between our private and public personas, so we reached out to Glenn Geher, Ph.D. He is a professor of psychology at the State University of New York at New Paltz and a published author, and kindly answered our questions.
We asked Dr. Geher about why human beings tend to adjust their behavior around different groups of people and in various environments. He walked us through this.
"People definitely evolved to adjust behavior based on the nature of situations that they run into. Behavior at a wedding is usually joyful, while behavior at a funeral is typically solemn. People who are good at 'reading the room' and adjusting their behaviors based on the demands of particular situations tend to navigate the waters of the social world better than those who are low on this skill," he explained to Bored Panda.
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"The field of acting seems to harness this feature of our evolved psychology—with better actors essentially being those who are particularly effective at adjusting their behaviors to conform to certain roles or situations, even if such behavior does not match their natural inclinations," he said in an email.
Considering how advantageous it appears to be behaviourally flexible, we were wondering whether it was worth bridging the gap between our private and public personas at all. According to Dr. Geher, it's important to consider our relationship with our most authentic selves here. There's a balance that needs to be found.
#4
RIP.
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"While adjusting one's behavior based on situational demands is very human and often appropriate, consistently presenting oneself as very different from one's core, authentic self might be stressful for various reasons," Dr. Geher told us.
"So, while I would say that it is important for people to be able to be behaviorally flexible, being so should not come at the cost of being true to oneself. Once again, I'd say, Shakespeare was right: 'To thine own self, be true.'"
#7
I read recently how Bruce Willis is going downhill with dementia, but what struck me is the article said that he had always been a voracious reader. Don’t know why but it hit me funny, that Mr Action man was a bookworm. (And sadly, is losing that now too).
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I ran into Jonathan BANKS at the Starbucks in Malibu. He played Mike Ehrmentraut on Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul. Very laid back and nice guy who chatted up a few teenage kids. Chill dude.
With the spread of the internet (5.45 billion global users and counting!) and the continued rise of social media (5.17 billion users worldwide), it’s easier now than ever to follow what other people are doing. This doesn’t just mean what your family, friends, and colleagues are doing.
You can, without much difficulty, constantly stay up to date with what your heroes are doing, whether they’re actors or athletes you admire, musicians who molded your taste in music, or comedians who never fail to brighten up your day. This has massively contributed to the spread of so-called parasocial relationships.
#11
I’ve heard from several people I know that have met & worked with Will that he’s nothing like his onscreen characters. He’s actually pretty laid back and soft spoken off camera. Totally what you wouldn’t expect based on some of the roles he’s known for.
#12
Parasocial relationships are, at their core, one-sided. They happen when one person is completely unaware of the other’s existence. Meanwhile, the latter invests a lot of their time, energy, and effort in being involved in the former’s life.
These days, parasocial relationships form between fans and celebrities, bloggers, influencers, sports teams, gamers, and TV stars. In the past, it was TV personalities who were most often the ‘targets’ of these one-sided relationships. But these stars’ interactions with their fans were far more limited and formal back then. Fast-forward to the current date and you have an incredible array of tools to interact with your followers all over the world: from social media and live streams to blog posts and in-person meetups.
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It was awesome. I was fully expecting Legally Blonde pinks and prep, not her in some moody robe pulling the drapes in melancholy before a seance.
Given all of this context, it’s not unusual to think that you ‘know’ a celebrity you follow as though they were a personal friend of yours. However, this is a misperception. Without sounding overly judgmental, you only get to know what they want you to know. It’s their public ‘face,’ similar to what you ‘put on’ when you go to work, meet with clients, attend fancy events, etc.
Getting to know a celebrity in person or watching some candid, in-depth, behind-the-scenes interviews can really change your relationship with them. Some fans might feel like they’ve finally ‘met’ the real, authentic star. Others might feel ‘betrayed’ that the person they’ve grown to admire for so long is only a small fragment of their personality.
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Which celebrities do you avidly follow and why, dear Pandas? Which stars do you know for a fact are very different in private? Have you ever had the luck of getting to meet any of your heroes in person?
If you were a celebrity, how would you interact with your fans? How different are your own private and public personas? Let us know what you think in the comments!
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