Loss of privacy is one of the most terrifying things that can happen to a person. Cybersecurity is a real issue, as there is a cyberattack happening almost every 39 seconds somewhere in the world. And it's next-level scary once you find out it's a family member who is doing it to you.
When this young woman found out her brother was spying on her through her laptop and possibly had installed a security camera somewhere in her dorm, she sought help online about what to do next. What followed was a saga few could have predicted: a story of stalking, family estrangement, and ruined lives.
A woman almost had her life ruined by her brother's stalking tendencies
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She found out he had hacked into her laptop, but the control only escalated from there
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When she tried talking to her parents, they sided with her brother
People told the woman she was underreacting and should take this much more seriously
Cyberstalking by partners and close contacts is more common than people realize
This is the reality of modern day: stalkers can reach you even when you're on your phone, laptop, or any other device. It's estimated that 40% of mobile users worldwide have experienced stalking or suspected they were being stalked.
Granted, this happens mostly with intimate partners. Sadly, a whopping 42% of Britons believe that it's justified to cyber-stalk their partners. Family members, especially parents, aren't exempt as well. One American survey shows that 25% of parents track their adult children with the help of apps or AirTags.
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It's not surprising that older siblings may start doing so, too. When we're children, sibling relationships can be rocky. However, researchers observe that 85% of siblings in the U.S. engage in some form of psychological mistreatment, such as verbal bullying, lack of respect for privacy, or controlling behaviors.
According to the Cyber Helpline, it doesn't matter who the perpetrator is – it's imperative to get help from experts and authorities right away. They urge victims to contact the police right away and seek further help from any specialist stalking charity.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, daughters often fall victim to stalking by parents more than sons do. According to a 2023 Pew Research Center survey, 31% of parents track their young adult daughters, and only 21% parents track their sons.
Victims of emotional violence might find it hard to get help from conservative religious family members
Religion plays a big part in some people's lives. In some cases, as was true in this story, people are so deep in their religious affiliations that they would be willing to denounce and even disown their children.
Studies show that members of religious communities often side with the perpetrators rather than the victims. When it comes to domestic violence, victims are often told to keep quiet, be patient, or even blamed for the harassment they experience.
"Religious messaging from faith communities and sacred texts is often used to dissuade those experiencing [violence] from reporting the harm or leaving the [violent] relationship," authors of one study conclude. "The culture within religious communities prioritizes power, and victims often find themselves oppressed on multiple fronts."
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When a teen or an adult decides to leave a religious group, they may have to make peace with cutting ties with their family members. Those who grew up in strict and conservative religious groups often don't speak to their parents, siblings, and childhood friends for the rest of their lives.
"Leaving a tight-knit religious group often includes the loss of an entire support system, community, or even family relationships," Anna Clark Miller, LPC-S, LMHC-S, NCC, previously told Bored Panda.
However, establishing independence is an important part of becoming an adult. "It's essential to recognize that your parents' or religious group's beliefs and biases don't have to be your own," Miller explained. "Questioning assumptions, changing your mind, and acknowledging differing opinions are all healthy parts of being an independent adult."
Many survivors of domestic violence say that the members of their religious group and the clergymen shame them for their experiences and urge them to keep quiet. What the sister in this story experienced was undoubtedly a form of emotional violence by her brother. Yet, even her "parish leader" didn't help her when she asked.
Later, the young woman was shocked to find a hidden camera in her bathroom
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"They don't believe me about the camera, and my dad said he specifically didn't care even if it was there," she wrote in an update
When her brother was finally in custody, she faced another problem
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In a later update, she detailed how her brother and parents recruited others to harass her
Finally, she posted an update that few people could have foreseen
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Commenters expressed support and compassion for the poor girl
