"Shut The Hell Up": 35 Dads Share Birthing Room Experiences And Give Advice To New Parents

There is a lot of yelling and cussing. Mom gets a pass to say whatever she wants and that's ok. Mom loses her sense of humor. That's also ok. She won't be able to drink water. You are there to support her no matter what she says or does. It's painful and not fun. Stay up near her head. Let her squeeze your hand till your fingers fall off.

When you see your kid for the first time. Your brain will get chopped in half. Everything will change in an instant. You are now a DAD. Your life as it has been is over. Welcome to your new life.

Super crazy s**t and mine was only 12 hours. Only thing to say, do not deny a pregnant woman that wants you there, no matter the situation. It’s beyond comprehension what the ladies go through to make people.


Other thing, write it all down within 48 hours. Everything you can remember. Otherwise it just disappears in the sleep deprivation insanity.

Have conversations with your spouse about what she wants to do. Some people have it video taped, some just want support, and some may not want you there because some people don't like to be seen in immense pain. This conversation should be slow, honest, and taken very seriously.

For me, I was a firm believer that in general the day/delivery is about her. She's going through the medical procedure and it's her body that's going through all sorts of changes in a short time. But, it immediately turns into an "us" moment the instant we turn into a family and hear those beautiful cries.

For us, on all 3, (solo, and twins), I was there with my wife. C-sections. I stayed behind "the wall" so I could look into my wife's face and support her. I trusted the medical staff to take care and show us the kids once delivered, but should anything go wrong, I wanted to be there for my spouse, and she agreed. No pictures in the room, it was for us and the kids. Pictures/video were before and after the procedure.

For the record, babies do not come out pink and beautiful. Go to the checkups and have the conversation with the Doc about what to expect.

Hold your partner's hand. Share the love and support for each other and see it in each other's eyes.

And have plenty of coffee at home.

Be mentally prepared to be amazed by the human body. She is giving up her beautiful body to carry on your legacy. Tell her how much you love her over and over.

Dont look at the cookie if you cant stomach the blood and liquids, afterbirth, mess. Former coworker thought he could handle it, looked down there, got dizzy, fell backwards, hit his head on the floor, had a grand mal seizure and was in the hospital a month longer than his wife, who had just given birth to their son. Wife was not happy.

Lastly, be ready to fall in love with a new little person that you helped create. That experience alone is extremely special. Make eye contact, make physical contact, make vocal contact. It’s a life changing experience. Enjoy life creation.

You were happy to be there for the conception, but you don't think you want to be there for the birth, because it's just not s**y?

My husband and I are a team. We made our baby together, we were together in labor, we parent together. If he decided not to show up for the most painful, scariest part of the process because he thought it was gross and unsexy? I may have filed for divorce. Not hyperbole.

I'm so glad I didn't miss it. Was such an amazing experience.

Don't miss it just for fear of blood etc. It's your partner and your child be there for her, she will want support.

Our first had the umbilical cord around his neck, and they figured it out by his heartrate going down when his mom pushed.

From one second to the next there were like three doctors, ten nurses and some random trainee in the room with us, being eerily calm but working furiously to get my little dude out.

10 minutes later, I was holding him in my arms, feeding him from a bottle (mom has a double mastectomy from breast cancer) as the crew was doing stiches on my SO.

He's 10 now, gaming on PC like his old man.

100% recommend. Would not have had it any other way.

And did it again three years later when my daughter was born.

I have three kids and I was there for all three. It makes me feel closer to them and I have a good relationship with my wife, their mom, because of it.

Be there. That's the only thing expecting fathers need to hear. "Be there.".

I was pretty old when my son was born and I was a combat medic in the army for a while before that. Basically, I knew it was going to be gross and I also knew it wasn't as gross as comedians make it sound. But at the end I didn't really see anything. I sat next to my wife, held her hand, encouraged her and just was there for her. The doctor and nurses did a pretty good job keeping things covered up and I didn't demand to watch. When my son came they asked if I wanted to cut the cord so I did. Then I went with the nurse who took my baby boy to be cleaned and whatnot and I just stood next to that table-lamp thing he was placed on while they did their thing to him before taking him to my wife. It really wasn't as big a deal as I thought. I think the biggest dilemma I faced was when the nurse took my son to another room and asked if I wanted to go with her or stay with my wife. I opted to stay with my wife. I sort of figured "I 'known her a lot longer so I guess this makes the most sense".

Man up and do it. These men that freak out about it being gross or whatever are ridiculous. Your spouse is going through the craziest s**t you can't even fathom, be there for her. If you don't wanna look, don't look.

Stay focused on your wife and her needs, stay out of the way, and cut the cord when offered.

1) Watch, observe and confirm what you hear with all the medical staff: doctors, nurses and the machines and charts.

2) speak up if something doesn’t look right. Advocate for your wife and babies care. Do it in a polite and factual way “hey, the doctor at night told me that my wife was not supposed to have xyz anymore. Can you confirm if that’s still true?” Or “at her last birth the surgeon said to tell staff the next time she gives birth that this xyz complication happened because it’s most likely going to happen again” or whatever.

3) block and tackle - respect you wife’s wishes on who should be there and when and why. She might not want visitors right after. Make her wishes happen.

It was awesome in the truly biblical sense of the word. You are witnessing new life - your child - being brought forth by the woman you love.

It's messy, noisy, and bloody, but it is real life creation. Do not miss it.

I have three kids and was there for all three births. There was nowhere else I would've wanted to be.

C-sections are f*****g insane things to see. The most distinct memory I have of it is thinking "Wow, so that's what the inside of my wife looks like" followed by "That...seems like way too much blood".

Everything was fine. It's all routine and they did a good job. My kid was okay despite the emergency c-section. But boy did it look like a nightmare in the moment.

All I can say to prepare anyone is just to do your best to show up and be present. Your partner will need you in that moment with them.

I didn't even know not being in the delivery room was an option.

Time to be a man. Coach your girlfriend. She's going to be stressed and scared and in pain. Just keep repeating "good… good…. You're doing good… breath…" in a calm, soothing voice for as many hours or days it takes for baby to show up. That's all.