“Hey Bambi”: 67 Times A First Date Was Completely Ruined When An Ick Reared Its Ugly Head

He met my parents and while on our way to dinner, two firetrucks passed us. He apparently was a wannabe fireman, so we followed the trucks. Never made it to dinner. After the fire was extinguished I asked him to take me back home.

Sat down for coffee. She looked younger than her stated 20yrs and photos of her had made her look older. I was 23 at the time and asked her. Said she was 18. I was a bit iffy but she was cute and we had common interests. Date goes well, ask her if she wants to come to a bar for a drink, she gets quiet. She was actually 16. Noped the hell out while telling her she needs a therapist.

She kept repeating that she was a "born again" Christian. Randomly. Like during conversations that had nothing to do with religion. She would just shoehorn it into the most random topics.... also she wanted to see a movie after dinner and as we were walking over there she used the line "but no funny business, I'm not that kind of girl" line on me. Then tried to put her hands down my pants 5 minutes into the previews. Like, what in the twilight zone is going on with here!? This chick is berserk.

In our mid-40s(me) and...late 30s(her). She was cute and fairly nice.

Literally the most heinous breath. It was a cloud around her. Passersby collapsed. Rotted meat & garlic? I just couldn't think of how to politely hand her a toothbrush and a gallon of mouthwash 10 minutes after meeting (we were set up by a mutual acquaintance), so I endured, said goodbye at the first possible minute, and ran for fresh air.

My cat has committed acts of olfactory violence in the litter box tonight that were more pleasant.

I wish her well, but holy hell.

I don't know if she was trying to blow the date; was somehow honestly unaware; or just grievously miscalculated a light liver & garlic with onions pre-date snack, but it was rancid.

I have a few!

Dude dropped the n word while I was directing him to my place over the phone. That didn't actually turn into a date though I guess, I canceled right then.

Dude started rifling through my stuff and kept commenting on things that would or wouldn't be allowed WHEN we moved in together. First and last date!

Dude told me he fell asleep every. Single. Morning on his drive to work like it was no big deal. He also lied about his height. I'm super short, and I've never cared much about height, but the very obvious lie of saying he was 5'9 and then showing up eye level with my 4'11 was pretty weird, but I figured low self esteem is a problem. But he was genuinely off-putting all around and a terrible driver.

They swerved to try and hit a Cat.

I was the ick... 🥲

This was years ago, think middleschool when your parents drop you off at the movies so you can meet your "date" and hold hands/kiss during the flick.

Parents drop me off, I say hi to said date who I thought was so cute, and we order popcorn/snacks.

Well... before we go in he makes me laugh, and a booger *the kind that is half hard and half slime* shoots out my nostril, but is STILL ATTACHED by a snot string.

So what do I do in a knee perk reaction? What any awkward weirdo would in an instant!

I sniff thay booger right back up my nose, while he looks at me with sheer horror in his eyes.

There was silence, one awkward "heh" that was probably his way of calling 911 mentally, and then the LONGEST movie of my life.

After that, we got married and had a kid together!

Just kidding. He never talked to me again.

And that is why I never blow my nose or let my sneezes out. Ever. 💀.

Went on a double date in college and we all rode in the same SUV. We weren’t really feeling each other. So after dinner he asked to be dropped off at the strip club. Gave me the ick then but now I think it’s hilarious.

I went on a date with a guy who knew I wasn’t into board games, yet centered the entire date around them and took me to a board game café. Every time I lost, he would make finger guns with sound effects and call me a loser. He also spent more time talking to the waiter than to me.

At one point, he said he ‘never eats in front of someone he’s attracted to’… then immediately ate my leftovers. To make it even weirder, his name was the same as my brother’s, and he would not stop bringing it up.

Honestly, the finger guns were the biggest ick.

Well finding out after we were intimate that her husband (she said she was divorced from) kids and in laws were at the restaurant, she chose, sitting just across from us, was nice.

They were separated for a few weeks. He didn't know she was dating and she had said the word divorced multiple times in our talks and spoke of it as being well in the past tense.

I said I was vegetarian.


She said "I used to be too but it gave me bad vaginal leakage."


I don't need to know that on a first date.

Gave me the complete list of their mental illnesses. Kudos for self knowledge and transparency. Still not going to have a second date.

Wasn't a date, but guaranteed there would never be a chance of one.

This psychopath went HAM on the endless breadsticks at Olive Garden but only ate the top of each breadstick, where all the seasoning and oil/butter was.

Madness.

Had a woman that invited me over to her place (during Covid, everything was closed, I suggested a public park or something but she declined in favor of her place) and ask me to get her pregnant.

I declined. She was hot. She kicked me out. Saw her in bumble about 6 months later and she was 6 months pregnant. So she found someone to do it. Insane.

Blind date in high school on a double date with friend and her boyfriend. Went to dinner before a movie and we were seated at a booth. I prefer the outside and told him he could go in first. He said it was okay to for him to sit on the outside. I explained my preference and he pointed at the booth and said “sit”. My friend and his friend just gaped. The rest of the night was awkward for them.

I showed him a funny video with some girl in it, he didn't laugh, just said the girl looks fat. Immediate ick.

He invited me over to make sushi. We were chilling in his room talking when he says he’s going to check the rice. He brings the container from the rice cooker upstairs into his room and starts stirring the rice WITH HIS FINGERS… licks the rice off his fingers and proceeds to start shaping the rice in the sushi mold thing right there on a tray on the floor, with his sticky spitty fingers he just licked. Mind you, his room wasn’t very clean, he did this right next to some dirty shorts in the ground.

Yeah, I didn’t eat the sushi and had my friend come pick me up ASAP (he had picked me up for our “date” so I didn’t have a ride). I didn’t know what other psychotic things he would be into so I just told him I started not feeling very well and my friend was in the area and was going to give me a ride back.

Told me she slept with a couple of my buddies. "Guess its your turn."

My worst date was a blind date and he kept telling me how rich he was constantly and that he was going to inherit a lot of money. And then he started talking about how he could get a hotel room anywhere because he knows people. Just ICK. Also he kept going to the bathroom constantly. At the time I thought he was nervous but looking back he was probably doing lots of snow in the bathroom lol.

He honked my breast out of nowhere. Just went in cold, no lead up or anything. We hadn't even kissed yet.