28 Of The Funniest And Most Sarcastic Insults People Have Ever Heard From Someone

Now that we have already mentally prepared you for what awaits you next - and perhaps you have already read a couple of witty stories - let's turn to the original source. As often happens, it was the AskReddit community, where the user u/MiniSamuroid once asked netizens: "What is the best insult someone has said to you?"

Almost two thousand upvotes and over 1.1K various comments were the result of this question - and in these comments, in fact, there is a real treasure trove of lively people's wit. So now let's go on reading these small tales selected for you by Bored Panda!

No matter how witty the insult is, it's almost always a violation of someone's personal boundaries. And the further development of the situation actually depends on the correct response to the insult. Today, showing that the offender's words didn't hurt you at all is probably the most correct response. In the old days, an insult had to be answered with an even more sophisticated punchline.

"The history of witty insults actually goes back to ancient times, when human speech was sometimes the only source of entertainment for many people. Especially when the vast majority could neither read nor write," says Valery Bolgan, a historian and editor-in-chief of the Intent news agency from Ukraine, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment.

"That's why people have been honing the verbal component of their wit for centuries. In ancient times, before the start of a battle, leaders or individual warriors would ride out in front of their army and begin to insult their enemies and their leaders as offensively and wittily as actually possible. It was really important not to resort to direct insults. The more refined the punchline was, the better."

"As a result, victory in such a verbal confrontation was considered the first step to victory on the battlefield, inspired the warriors. Because when your enemy is humiliated and disgraced - you feel superior to them. In many historical epics describing large-scale battles - for example, in Homer's 'Iliad', there are examples of such verbal duels," Valery sums up.

"Today, in the age of the Internet, we have the opportunity to repeatedly hone our punchlines before uttering them to another person's face. And largely because of this, the talent of improvisational wit has been irretrievably lost by many people..."

However, today, we have a lot of professional advice on how to deal with verbal insults - even if you are amazed by the wit of the person who insulted you. For example, Ajita Robinson, a therapist in Bethesda, Md., recommends using football terminology when saying things like, "Hey, flag on the play." This suggests that you believe another person has committed "a penalty."

"It’s lighthearted, but sends a signal that the comment or interaction has crossed a boundary," Time quotes Ajita Robinson in this dedicated article. In addition, some experts also believe that being offended by an insult is actually taking it to heart.

"We need never take offense at an insult. Offense exists not in the insult but in our reaction to it, and our reactions are completely within our control," Neel Burton, M.D., a psychiatrist, philosopher, and writer from Oxford, UK, says in his article on Psychology Today. "If we take offense at [someone's] bad behavior, we have only ourselves to blame."

In any case, we strongly believe that all of you, readers of this post, are exceptionally well-mannered and polite people, so you'll perceive all of these almost three dozen mini-tales as simply an example of good sarcastic humor. Well, and if you write in the comments your own examples of brilliant insults ever heard by you - we'll be doubly grateful to you as well!