People Share 30 Signs That Scream Someone Is Having A Secret Affair

My ex would sleep with her phone under her pillow. I had an idea it was happening and would keep an eye on this guys MySpace. Then he posted one of the questionnaire things that were popular at the time, one of the questions was who did you last kiss? And his answer was my ex.

MySpace Tom had my back.

Edit: a lot of you seem to think that she might have been browsing the internet, this was a time before internet was available on your phone, there was nothing to do on a phone other than call and text.

Most phones also didn’t screen locks with passwords or facial recognition, anyone could get on your phone so the best way to avoid this would be hide it. Or sleep with it under your pillow so if someone does try to get it, they wake you up.

Phone keeps ringing but he won't answer it

When they suddenly start taking extra interest in their appearance and getting in shape by “going for walks” even up to 10 pm by the time they return and they don’t answer your worried calls because “they had music on with headphones”. And when you ask them why they didn’t answer it’s because “they didn’t hear the calls come in” despite you having the exact same phone and know that the incoming calls cut over the music.

When they randomly start arguments for no reason or just start being disrespectful out of the blue.

If they accuse you of cheating constantly

When my husband cheated, it was definitely the phone. He was hiding at night when he’d go to bed. Also, wouldn’t ever let me go to work related get togethers that the other spouses would attend.

I guess I kinda allowed this to happen, but it still hurt just the same:

It was a couple of months after my Grandpa passed, and I hadn't given her the D at all in that time. Funny thing grief.....it f***s up so many things in the body.......anyway, in my grief ridden stupor, I trusted her when she said she was going for a drive with a friend to cut loose a bit. I was okay with it because i wanted her to have a good time and not be stuck in the house with my depressed a*s. She got home in a good mood and I didn't think anything of it till she went to wash *just* her underwear. I checked her phone that night after she fell asleep, and apparently, she had been talking to this guy for about a month. They had done the deed, and she wanted to make me out as the bad guy when I confronted her about it, with the evidence from her phone, saying I "pushed her to it by not having sex with her." I kicked her out in a hury, and don't really remember much except she was the one yelling and screaming. I was pretty much just numb, and I don't think I really proceeded it till almost 2 weeks later.

You’re at a party and the lead singer of a band starts singing a song about your girlfriend entitled “Scotty Doesn’t Know”

They admit to you they still have feelings for a “friend” they had romantic history with and continue to spend alone time with and get upset that you call them an ex 💀 Reality can be whatever they want.

An interesting one I haven't seen in the comments yet:
They start doing more, more small gifts, more help around the house, and simply just more involved in the relationship. This isn't always the reason why there was a sudden shift, but this can be an easily missed sign. The shift can happen because they feel guilty and are trying to make it up to you, it could be them trying to manipulate you into never even considering the idea of them cheating because they're so considerate, or maybe it's them trying to make it up to you without telling you.

This isn't a sign of cheating on its own though, it's just a sign that maybe you need to pay more attention and be alert to the relationship. The reasoning for paying more attention is: maybe they're struggling with depression or stress, or they've realized they've been a bit absent, or maybe you have, or any other number of reasons; Which is why it's a sign To be alert and figure out why there's a shift.

When you catch them admitting it over a security camera to their ex while you're out of state...

When they suddenly stop making time for you

when you come home and someone has eaten your jam

They tell you in a moment of anger, then try to pull it back.

These days, watch their phone behaviour, for starters.

Do they hide the screen when you walk behind them? Have they added a password or changed the password? (This may be innocent but could be suspicious.) Are they texting into the wee hours of the night while neglecting you? Have they disabled the little notifications that pop up without having to unlock the phone?

Some of these might not be a problem on their own, but you'll often notice other behaviours at the same time, like they ignore and neglect you more, find reasons to be in another room, take their phone to the bathroom all the time, or go for lots of breaks away from you.

You're on the lookout for secretive behaviours, neglect, and distance.