Just because someone looks ordinary or innocent, doesn’t mean that they don’t have skeletons hidden in their closet! Behind the smiles of normal-seeming families lie some dark secrets. And the babysitters working for these families sometimes stumble upon them by accident.
In a thread on r/AskReddit, the babysitters of Reddit have been sharing their chilling tales about the dark secrets that some ordinary-looking families were hiding. Have a read through some of them below and, if you’ve uncovered some frightening secrets while on the job yourselves, dear Pandas, you can share them in the comments at the bottom of this list.
In my opinion, there might be two main reasons why babysitters are able to uncover these family secrets. The first is that they spend a lot of time inside the family home, meaning that they can accidentally absorb a lot of sensitive information. The second reason, however, is that some parents simply aren’t careful around babysitters because they don’t respect them enough or simply aren’t afraid of the consequences of their actions.
The author of the post, redditor NuclearSquid74, was kind enough to give their perspective on the world of babysitting, family secrets, and the importance of privacy. You'll find their insights, which they shared with Bored Panda, below, so be sure to read on, dear Pandas.
#1
Somewhat wholesome story: I used to babysit for the kids down the street when I was in high school. One night I went into the parents’ bedroom to get something - I think a puzzle - and there was a book on the nightstand called “how to comfort your kids when you’re thinking of divorce” or something like that. The next time I was over, there was a book downstairs (on the mom’s desk) that was “the couples’ therapists’ guide to saving a failing relationship.”
It made me sad because the parents seemed really happy together whenever I saw them. I felt bad that they must have been going through a hard time behind the scenes. My parents had a pretty unhappy marriage so I tried to be extra nice to the kids. I hoped they hadn’t had to listen to their parents fighting.
Anyway, this went on for a few months with no further indications of trouble. I felt like I knew this awful secret that the kids didn’t know. One night I came over to babysit—the mom was in grad school and she had a class—and the same books were sitting on the counter. As the mom was leaving, she was like, “oh, I can’t forget the textbooks!” and grabbed them off the counter. I actually didn’t know what she was studying, so I asked what class she had. Turns out she was studying to be a couples’ and family therapist. The books I saw were her schoolbooks. In retrospect, that made complete sense because the titles were kind of academic, but I immediately assumed they were divorcing.
About a decade later, they are still married and the wife is a very successful couples and family therapist. Go figure.
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322points
#2
I'm not sure of this counts but this is my secret between myself and my nephew.
My sister was 23/24 and she was going through her divorce. She and her 3 year old son came to live with us. I was in high school at the time and devoted all of my after school time to him. He and I were close. We were so close I would be on the couch with him in my lap at 3am watching In the Night Garden for the billionth time, still in my school uniform but now smelling of regurgitated milk and doing math homework with my left arm.
Mean while my sister would be out partying and what not.
One day, it was just my nephew and I. At the time he was i think around 4? I was in my school uniform, getting ready to leave for school. He was "helping" me get ready by putting his favorite toys in my bag.
As I was heading out, I told him that I loved him like usual and he replied "I love you too mummy".
I was stunned but I was already running late so I brushed it off and went to school.
After that, when we were alone, my nephew started calling me "mummy". He was genuine. I asked him "What about mummy?" And he tells me how "she doesnt really love me, you love me. And nanny loves me".
I tried to encourage him to call me auntie again and he did when others were around but when we were alone, he looked at me with his sweet little eyes and called me "mummy".
He eventually says "I wish you were my real mummy".
Tantrums become more common for him. He throws them when his mum is around and begins to avoid her hugs. Her hugs were only there to pose for selfies and to show off what a good parent she is. He would start crying and screaming and get sent to his room for misbehaving. My mum (nanny) and my sister would go out and leave me in charge. I would then go to my nephew and give him a big ol' bear hug.
I'm not the parent and he isn't my child but our secret was mutual. I wished he were my child and he wished I was his mum.
We had to keep our wishes secret because if my sister knew that I was ruining her image by taking all of the mother-son love then hell would have broken loose. She was all about "self image" to the point she became a compulsive liar and she also has some other mental problems.
His teachers noticed our bond when he entered primary school and his afterschool baby sitters knew about his "other mum".
My nephew is 10 now. I don't know if he remembers any of this but the other day was my birthday and for the very first time, he tried to earn money through chores to by me a gift himself.
It was a squirtle amiibo.
TL;DR My baby nephew and I developed a secret mother/son bond that only teachers and babysitters picked up on and it had to be secret because his real mum is crazy.
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270points
#3
“My daddy hits my mommy sometimes.” For that one, I was still in high school. I told my mom what she said and my mom went to the police station to report it.
“I like it when you’re here, not the other lady. She’s mean and she makes me sit in the closet.” This little girl was referring to her dad’s girlfriend. I told the dad about it and never saw the girlfriend around again.
And for some comic relief... “My older brother and I play swords in the bathroom, daddy taught us how.” Asked him to show me with his action figures what he meant, expecting the worst, and he says look! And goes in his dad’s closet and pulls out these giant foam swords. Whew!
Thankfully not all in the same house.
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219points
"I'd imagine that babysitters are able to uncover so much due to the fact that they are allowed in people's homes. You can tell a lot about a person from what's in your house. Similarly, children (especially young ones) may also tattle about their parents, tell them things which may seem innocent to a child, but reveal a lot about the parents," the author of the thread, redditor NuclearSquid74, shared their perspective as to why babysitters can stumble across dark family secrets so often. A lot of it comes down to the babysitter being present in the house and gaining the family's trust.
"I think that parents mightn't be as careful around babysitters as they are around others as, when hiring a babysitter, you are letting someone into your home for a long time, trusting them with the things you should love more than any other: your children. When you are giving someone that level of trust, you can assume that they won't spread rumors about you or what you have done."
#4
I baby sat a lot when I was 13-15. At the time I lived in a small town. I was a very popular baby sitter as I also worked at the daycare centre. Often I would have kids from two or three different families at once. I didn't care I got triple the pay for having three different groups of kids. I was recently told why I always had groups of kids like that. Turns out the small town had a swingers club and I was the go to baby sitter for their different groups.
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209points
#5
I was giving the 4 year old a bath and he asked me "Why don't you touch me like dad does?" That was my first red flag. Eventually the dad would show up at home unannounced to just hang out with me when the kids were napping. (I was 18) One day he got a vasectomy and told me if I wanted he could send a couple "blank shots" at me. A few days later he full on assaulted me. I locked myself in the bedroom and called his wife; she wouldn't believe me. I called my brother and he rushed over with a baseball bat.
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208points
#6
One family- I still dunno what was up with them. It's like they were squatting in a model home or something. It was a fully furnished house that looked to be straight out of Better Homes & Gardens magazine, but there was nothing in the drawers, fridge or cabinets. No toiletries in the bathroom except for toilet paper, no food or silverware in the kitchen, no clothes in the closets or in the kid's drawers and no toys! The lady just told me to order food for the kids & they watched tv. It was weird!
170points
According to the author of the thread, it should be up to the babysitter whether or not they should reveal any secrets that they find out. It's a very personal decision. However, it's one that has a lot of implications for the future of the family, so the decision shouldn't be taken lightly either way. "They could ask their employers more about what they find out, or they could keep it to themselves. I don't think anyone necessarily should or shouldn't keep anything to themselves. It should be up to the babysitter's discretion," the redditor said.
I was curious to know what NuclearSquid74 thought about normal families and if 'normal' families exist at all. I completely agree with the redditor's opinion that it's "completely normal" to have secrets (whether small or grand) and to want to have some privacy.
"I definitely don't think a 'normal' family exists. Certainly, there are happy ones and there are less happy ones, but every family is different and communicates in their own way," they shared their opinion. "There certainly will be things that everyone wants to keep secret, be it a dark secret, or a more mundane thing (like what they like to get up to in the bedroom). I certainly think that all families have at least some secrets, but that doesn't necessarily mean that all families are hiding something scandalous."
#7
Took me a while to realize one of my little people's mom's was hurting him. He was a perfectly normal little rambunctious four year old so the bruises didn't bother me. Then he started acting out, hitting me, insulting me, expressing himself in other ways by pooping and peeing in inappropriate places. I did my research, talked to a child psychologist and a pediatrician, expressed to them my fears. They both encouraged and assisted me in calling CPS. The child was taken away, placed with his loving father and stepmother, who had been alienated by the mom.
The mom was, seemingly, a normal woman, cosmetologist with a huge client base, used to cut my hair for free, always did a good job. Everyone girl wanted her to do their homecoming/prom/military ball/wedding hair and makeup. She was a well-respected woman in town, had the ear of everyone from the school board to town hall. In short, she was everyone's friend, everyone wanted her to be on their volunteer committee, bake sale.
I called CPS and her entire image unraveled within a forty-eight hour period. It was further sullied when the courts revealed she had two other children by different men who had been removed from her custody and she had been permanently banned from seeing them due to gross negligence and abuse. She's currently serving a dime sentence at a North Carolina's women's facility.
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157points
#8
I nannied for this very rich family with three kids from the west coast who would come to south Florida for summer vacation every year. The mother was in her thirties, clearly had her kids when she was young, and was very stereotypically hot— blonde, thin, big boobs, perfect teeth. Her husband was a little older, salt and pepper, suuuuper handsome, very George Clooney-esque. Their kids were all blonde-haired, blue-eyed, cute as [hell]. They absolutely adored their parents.
Dad would help the kids and mom settle in at the house and then fly back to Cali for work. I babysat 3-5 times a week, 6:30pm-2am. Mom would get all dolled up, leave her wedding ring on the kitchen counter, and come home very late, clearly drunk, and sometimes brought men home with her that she introduced as her “friends.” She would often overpay me, which I never complained about, but I worried for the kids.
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149points
#9
I was a Nanny for a young boy with additional needs. Let's call the parents John and Lisa. John worked for Lisa's parents as they owned a painting company. This company had the family surname as its name. One day I noticed John was home from work early in the painting van but it had his surname as the company name on the van, not Lisa's parent's surname. I thought it was a funny coincidence that he and Lisa had the same surname and so I pointed this out. He froze up and looked a little awkward and said 'oh... That's because Lisa and I are first cousins'. They shared the same paternal grandparents and therefore the same surname. They had been together since they were young teenagers. I'm not actually sure if this is legal or not but it's certainly frowned up here.
135points
Many of the secrets that the babysitters of Reddit uncovered had to do with the parents’ infidelity toward one another. Affairs, clandestine romance, and secret boyfriends and girlfriends seem to be far more common than they should be.
However, the fact that so many babysitters opened up about these examples of infidelity proves that some parents aren’t very careful around the ‘hired help.’ That, in turn, shows that at least some of them don’t respect babysitters enough to be scared of them finding out. Though a few parents did bribe the babysitters to keep things hush-hush when caught in the act.
#10
I was babysitting for my neighbors, & they were super nice people, two kids, very pottery barn people. They would always come home late, with no cash to pay me, but they’d come by my house literally the next day with the cash, so I never minded, but I was always a little confused as to how they spent all their cash at dinner & a movie & somehow didn’t plan to pay the sitter, & how they managed to stay out til 3 am just doing dinner and a movie (& they were pretty wealthy, so it wasn’t like a waiting til payday thing). Once before they left, when they were in the other room saying goodbye to the kids, I went to move the wife’s purse and saw a really big roll of singles. I brushed it off, but then another time their daughter had an allergic reaction & I texted them a SOS. When I got a call back, I picked up & heard club music. It was a couple sittings after that, when I left through the back door and saw the husband in the garage, shaking glitter off their clothes, that I realized they were probably going to a strip club. When I went to college, they switched to using my sister as a sitter, & I sat down with her and explained where they went and not to ask or act suspicious. They were good parents, & it’s not like a problem, it was just super not the vibe they gave off & I kinda found it hilarious.
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120points
#11
I worked at a daycare center. To be clear, these parents did not seem very normal: mom had fake inflated Kardashian sized boobs and butt and was generally very conceited, like almost a stereotype of a person with a body that augmented. She stood out among the other parents who picked up their kids from the daycare after working 12 hour shifts scrubbing floors and doing other blue collar labor (large immigrant community). Dad was more down to earth so it seemed.
Younger Brother, age 7, told me he was anxious one day. He tended to be a worry wart, so I wasn’t surprised, but I asked him why. He says that his Dad yells at his mom a lot because she gets drunk, goes out and parties with her friends, and then he has to go and Pick her up, which leads to a lot of arguing. I told him that that’s really sad and that we would say a prayer for them (it was a Christian day are). A week or so later he excitedly told me that the prayer worked, and his parents weren’t arguing anymore. While Mac does say that all things are possible through God (so jot that down), i was only tenetively optimistic about YB’s revelation.
Older brother (8) was a completely different personality: a bully to the kids and adults, never had a positive thing to say. The things he seemed to like were his younger brother, fortnite and roblox (like you do). Most of the school year we had butted heads trying To get him to do homework, but towards the end of the year his behavior changed. He would say he was too stupid to do homework and would try to hold his breath to try and commit s**cide (in his own words). This seems like a huge red flag and he eventually broke down and said that his dad was abusive towards him and that his mom says she doesn’t like being around him. While he was prone to lying, he was crying (something he never did) and his behavior was like nothing me and my coworkers had never seen. That was my first time calling CPS and when the next school year started those kids didn’t come back.
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112points
#12
I used to babysit for my next door neighbor who had an 8 year old girl and a 5 year old boy. I was 13 when I started babysitting for them and I knew off the bat the kids were an interesting duo, to say the least, and I have too many stories to tell from when I was watching them. We all went to school together, so when we got off the bus, we'd walk to their apartment and I'd watch them, made sure we got homework done, and make them the Snack of the Day. One day, we had a half day at school, and I think the mom forgot, because when we walked into the apartment, I heard one of the doors shut. At the time, we thought it was an intruder, so I grabbed the 5yo's baseball bat, told them to stay in the room, and I'd do some investigating. I opened the bathroom door, and there was the mom, half naked, with a guy that wasn't her husband. She gave me all the money in her wallet and her business card (she was a photographer) and told me to never speak of it again. I caught her cheating and made out with $400 and a $650 photo shoot package (took pictures for all the upcoming holidays so I could keep giving gifts to my family). I babysat them for about 3 months after, before they moved away.
107points
Another way that this lack of respect can manifest is in low wages. Some parents aren’t providing their babysitters adequate compensation because they believe that looking after their ‘precious angels’ isn’t a job but a treat.
“They would love to be home with their child all day, so I think they feel like it’s not a real job. It’s something you get to do, and they’re mad they have to pay someone to do it,” one babysitter told Bored Panda earlier about the point of view that some families have towards nannies.
“They love their child, they’d do anything for their child. There’s a connection there that someone else could never have, and they can’t imagine not having that connection, so they treat it like it’s not a job, it’s a privilege. The ‘you’re so lucky you get to stay home with my baby while I have to go to work’ mindset, when in reality we leave our families to take care of yours; we don’t want to leave our families in the morning for work any more than you do, but it’s our job.”
#13
I babysat for them a few times. 3 kids, 1 eldest son, a pair of twins and a pair of doting parents. One of the twins was transgender, MTF. She was lovely, bubbly and a joy to be around. It was also really nice that the parents were super supportive of her. Included in their library were a few books on trans related issues,including that I am Jazz book.
It wasn't a hands on job. They mostly liked to watch whatever kids movie DVD and I would go on my laptop and do college work. Sometimes the twin would ask me to "help be pretty" and I would show her how to braid hair and s**t like that. The other twin who was a cis boy sometimes got involved but the eldest never did. I figured it was early 13 year old dude trying to be cool thing that everyone goes through and just let him be.
One day the parents came home as we were finishing doing our nails. The twins ran up to show the parents their nail colours and I was getting my payment when the eldest spoke up and said "you shouldn't pay her cause she's turning the other one into a f*ggot as well".
It was like time froze and everyone's mouths just dropped. I was hurried out of the house while I heard the little girl ask "what's a f*ggot". I wasn't asked over to babysit again. At first I thought it was because they thought I taught him that word but I quickly heard Village gossip that the eldest son was expelled from school for brandishing "disrespectful iconography" and they had to move somewhere else to put him in a different school.
It's been like 10 years now and I actually recently looked them up. Both twins are doing fine. He's training to be a pilot and she's in the catering business and is excited to start the hormone treatment. The eldest on the other hand is like poster boy white supremacist. Nazi salute and everything. I don't get it. Like the narrative of him not getting enough attention or getting picked on because of his sister doesnt even fit cause he was really high up on the soccer team and his parents and classmates loved him. He just fell into this s**tty hate spiral that he yet to come out of. I hope he snaps out of it one day but I hope at least he's leaving his sister alone. No one deserves to be called that word.
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102points
#14
I nannied for a wealthy couple (she was a surgeon, he was an architect), and the husband had a study in the house that the wife joked about never being allowed in. Now, I'm a nosy f**ker, and I was curious about why you wouldn't let someone in a study, esp since it looked like a fairly normal room: big desk, walls covered in bookshelves, books of architecture everywhere. So one day I just roamed around in there. I didn't really find anything, and I was kinda disappointed, but then I grabbed a book off one of the shelves. The thing had money pressed between it's pages - about $500, if I had to guess. Picked up another book, found the same thing. I think I checked like ten different books, and every single one had money hidden in it.
Still not sure if the dude was just paranoid about banks or if he was intentionally hiding money from his wife.
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101points
#15
I baby sat for this one family only a couple of times when I was 16. But on the first night they just casually talked about how I needed to call the police if the kids bio-dad turned up at the house. I was then told I would need to barricade us all in their master bathroom and I should call them and their lawyer. Custody battles suck.
100points
Meanwhile, according to the Chicago Collegiate Nannies, one of the most important aspects of a babysitter’s job is discretion. Especially when working with families who are very well known.
“Be sure not to publicize family’s private information on the internet and/or social media platforms. As common as the use of social media is in this generation, be sure to be careful with how you share information. This is especially important because of how many families prefer not to have their private family information (i.e. address, children’s names, your employer’s jobs, your employer’s marital status, etc.) online for everyone to see. Whatever you choose to post should always respect your family’s privacy and should never use specific information on the internet,” the CCN warns babysitters to be professional and very careful when dealing with sensitive information.
#16
I am a dude, and have had dogs for a large portion of my life. I live somewhere pretty close to a small park with a playground and I used to walk and play with my dog there frequently so I would meet this woman who had an adorable daughter quite often. Both she and her daughter liked my dog, so it would often end up with my dog and her daughter playing for a bit while me and the mother were talking about stuff. I am quite laidback and chill, so after talking for some time she asked if I would like to care for her daughter sometime if she was gonna be busy (as she trusted me). As I liked her daughter I didnt mind, we ended up just playing mario kart and chillin on the sofa while I told her stories until she had to go to bed.
The mother came home pretty drunk on a few occasions and we ended up sleeping together a few times. What she hadnt told me about was that she had a husband that was working offshore, the kind of work where he would be gone for weeks at a time with no cell reception, something I kinda found out when I passed her house while walking my dog, seeing a man working in the garage and the garden several days in a row. I asked the woman the next time I met her if she had met someone new as I saw some guy at her home.
Her face changed immediately and she poured it quietly all out to me, she was miserable with her husband cause he was an alcoholic and was rarely at home cause of work where he always worked overtime. She had fallen for me and thought that I was one of the sweetest men she had ever met, and she would rather be with me than with him.
So her nice house, expensive car and all sorts of gadgets were paid by her husband while I as a lowly middle range wage man was boning his wife and bonding with his daughter while he was gone. I felt so bad about it so I told her that we should stay as friends, but that I would keep her secret if she promised to care as well as she could for her daughter, and if s**t hits the fan I would look after her daughter.
Its been over 1 year now and we still occasionally talk, but I still feel pretty bad about it all. I just hope the daughter doesnt know.
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92points
#17
Seemingly a happy family, but the child had a lot of odd behaviors. The most obvious one was she'd cry if you laughed in front of her. Her mom told me the 4 yr old child would assume you were laughing at her. One time I group babysat at a neighbor's house with this child and when the father came to pick the child up, the neighbor's dog when ballistic and tried to bite him. Shortly after it came out that the dad was abusing the daughter.
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92points
#18
A family member of mine was a babysitter in the 70s. A couple who lived nearby asked her to babysit their baby a few times. I didn’t get the sense that she knew them well. Every time she’d go they said the baby was sleeping and not to disturb the baby by checking on it. The baby never cried. The parents would come home and relieve her. She never saw or heard a baby.
At the time I don’t think my family member thought much of it, but has told me this story several times because it keeps nagging at her. How could a baby be asleep for the entire time she was there, every time. No noises. Nothing. Today, she thinks there must not have been a baby but has no idea why they’d hire her.
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88points
What’s more, the CCN warns babysitters to always behave as though they were being watched. This way, they can always stay professional and mindful of how they present themselves. And even though babysitting can be very challenging (especially if the parents themselves are incredibly demanding), nannies should be very careful to who they air their grievances.
Sharing your story anonymously on a website like Reddit can be a good way to vent some frustration. Just remember to keep any identifying details out of your posts. No matter how juicy, spooky, and dark the secrets you’ve uncovered really are.
#19
My sister, age 14 in 1982, was babysitting for a family down the street. One of the kids threw up, an my mom ended up over there. My mom called the parents (pre-cell phones), and couldn't find some cleaning supplies, since the garage was locked. The parents rushed home, everything got sorted, nothing really unusual.
A few weeks later, that family got raided by the FBI. They had planted some bombs in a refinery in Texas, and had a small arsenal in that locked garage.
"On Sept. 28, 1982, the Cedar Bayou plant received a letter from an anonymous person that ten bombs had been hidden within the plant. The sender of the letter threatened to detonate the bombs unless Gulf Oil paid $15 million. Gulf Oil shut down the Cedar Bayou plant after determining the letter was a legitimate threat. A search of the Cedar Bayou plant located five sophisticated bombs in metal casings. A federal and multi-state investigation led to the arrest of four people—John Marvin McBride; his common-law wife, Jill Renee Bird; Michael Allen Worth, and Theodore D. McKinney, all of Durango, Colorado. Charges against Jill Renee Bird were dropped in exchange for her husband's cooperation."
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85points
#20
Not so much as dark but really sad. I baby sat for a typical upper middle class family, dad worked mom was stay at home. The mother was always a little over protective like checking on their daughter the second they got home, but I didn't think much of it.
One night they came home and we talked a little. She mentioned how much she loved children and her daughter so I asked her if they ever thought about having another. She completely broke down and explained that she had multiple miscarriages before and after her daughter so they stopped trying. I felt really awful and really sad because it seems like she wanted another baby.
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81points