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To get some insight from someone with a unique perspective into this topic, we reached out to Hannah McKnight, a returning interview guest of Bored Panda! Hannah has significant experience presenting as male and female, so she has witnessed how men behave behind closed doors.
She has a mission - to talk about balancing life between genders, trans activism, social awareness, and everything that entails. If you’d like to find out more about her, make sure to visit her website!
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Hannah begins by talking a little about gender identity and her own identity in relation: “I'm a transgender girl. Identifying as transgender, in my opinion, is very inclusive and can cover quite a few different, albeit nuanced, gender identities. Being transgender doesn't necessarily mean transitioning, taking hormones, or legally changing one's name. If I need to get more specific about my gender, I identify as bi-gender. What this means to me is that I don't feel the need to, ah, commit to one gender identity or to one gender presentation. Sometimes I am wearing a necktie and use he/him pronouns, other days I am strutting around a bookstore in a cute dress.”
“Of course, gender is a social construct and gender isn't binary, but that is a topic for another time."
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She goes on to talk about how it may be difficult for some cisgender people to grasp gender identity: “Gender identity is a strange and difficult concept for some cisgender people to understand. I think much of this comes from an inability to relate to someone who feels the gender they were assigned at birth isn't quite right. I don't fault someone for not being able to relate to me. We all have different experiences and these experiences shape our opinions and feelings and thoughts. If you've never felt like the gender the doctor scribbled on your birth certificate was wrong, it's not always easy to grasp why someone would feel this way. No, I don't expect anyone to understand me. But I would hope, at the very least, you treat me kindly.”
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Women see it just... we don't really need men the way they need women.
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Hannah begins talking about her own life and being privy to guys’ “locker room talk”: “Because of the dual life/lives that I live, I feel I get a little glimpse into the different perspectives people have about gender and gender roles. When I present as male, men talk to me like I am 'one of the guys'. These conversations can range from sports to social topics to inappropriate comments. I suppose some people would call this 'locker room talk' but I think that's in an effort to excuse certain behavior.”
“I am not out to the majority of the people in my (male) life. Almost everyone I know thinks of me as the guy they work with or their buddy from high school. My gender identity isn't on their radar. Because of this, some people in my life have no hesitation sharing their perspective on women... whether they are cisgender or transgender. Sometimes they will complain about how long it takes for women to get ready or ridicule their teenage daughters for being dramatic about a silly boy. These opinions are rather telling when it comes to their perspective on women. Perhaps they feel women are too shallow or emotional. Perhaps they feel women are weaker for having emotions."
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According to her, society still misunderstands transgender people and she shares how that has affected her: “Over the last few years, transgender people have become a very charged discussion. We have been politicalized and demonized. We are discussed and scrutinized. We have become perverted villains in the eyes of many. It's strange to have this spotlight on people like myself, but it is quite an experience to hear my coworkers and family members discuss non-binary people. Sometimes someone voices their support or mentions that their friend is transgender.”
“Other times, well, it's less encouraging.”
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The upside for me just wasn’t there compared to what I had to sacrifice.
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Our interviewee points out the inherent perspective of some men that women are weaker or inferior: “I've heard men discuss people like me and how they don't understand us. And that's fine... I guess. Like I said earlier, I am not trying to be understood. I just want to be treated kindly. Sometimes these conversations have led to men wondering why anyone would want to be a woman. ‘Why would anyone want to be inferior?’ they ask. ‘Why go from being a man to a girl?’ I've heard some men say that they kind of understand why a woman would want to transition to male, as if it's somewhat of a ‘promotion’, if you will.”
“This is, of course, not a reason people transition,” Hannah goes to finish, “But it is a reflection of how some men blatantly see their gender as superior. They may not understand transgender people, but they certainly understand why someone would want to be male.”