High school is a weird little kingdom where the social ladder is everything, and climbing to the top feels like you’ve conquered the entire world. Your letterman jacket is your crown, and the yearbook is your book of achievements, a permanent record of your reign.
But then graduation happens, and the kingdom dissolves. The cheering stops, the hierarchies vanish, and you're just another person trying to figure out how to do laundry and pay taxes. Netizens posed a fascinating question to those who admittedly "peaked in high school," and the brutally honest answers paint a sobering picture of life after the glory days.
More info: Reddit
#1
Last year, at a wedding reception I ran into a guy who played basketball at our high school ten years ago. He held the school record for most points scored in a game, somewhere in the 30s. I don't remember. Anyway, a friend and I were talking with him next to the bar, and he says, "Man, I miss high school. It used to be every Friday night all these people would come, watch me play, and cheer me on. It was the best. I miss those days."
"So what are you up to now?"
"Oh, just working at the car wash. My dad gave it to me. You should come by some time. I'll give you a free wash."
"Business must be going good for you then."
"No, not really."
"That sucks."
"Yeah, it is what it is. Anyway, I'm go grab another drink. It was nice catching up with you guys."
He leaves. Later on, another classmate of ours tells us that the guy just tipped the waitress with some car wash tokens, and asked for her number. We mentioned our conversation about high school basketball. "Oh yeah, he doesn't stop talking about that."
Reflecting on that conversation, I remember when I was younger, and one of the "popular" kids would pick on me, adults told me not to be jealous of them because it wouldn't last. I hoped it to be true. But having experienced the moment ten years later, I just feel sorry for the guy.
"So what are you up to now?"
"Oh, just working at the car wash. My dad gave it to me. You should come by some time. I'll give you a free wash."
"Business must be going good for you then."
"No, not really."
"That sucks."
"Yeah, it is what it is. Anyway, I'm go grab another drink. It was nice catching up with you guys."
He leaves. Later on, another classmate of ours tells us that the guy just tipped the waitress with some car wash tokens, and asked for her number. We mentioned our conversation about high school basketball. "Oh yeah, he doesn't stop talking about that."
Reflecting on that conversation, I remember when I was younger, and one of the "popular" kids would pick on me, adults told me not to be jealous of them because it wouldn't last. I hoped it to be true. But having experienced the moment ten years later, I just feel sorry for the guy.
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35points
#2
29 male. Until recently, High-school was the peak of my life. In high school I was good looking, popular, athletic, and a decent student. My parents were rich and I had a BMW. I played varsity soccer all 4 years at a school of 2500 kids and was recruited by division 1 schools all over the country. College was a good experience as well until the very end when I realized I was not good enough to become a pro soccer player. I graduated with a communications degree because I had no idea what I wanted to do. Big Mistake.
After college I had a horrible time finding a job. I ended up working the front desk at the gym near my parents house for 3 years. I would open the gym at 5am 5 days a week. A lot of the people that came in would be people I knew in high school. Sometimes they would act like they didn't know who I was in order to avoid an awkward situation, which just made it worse. There was a girl that I went to a dance with Sophomore year that would come in every morning. My job is to greet anyone that walks in so the first few times I would say hi "name" and she would swipe her card and completely ignore me. At a certain point my parents stopped helping me with money and I couldn't afford to fill my gas tank. I would ride my old bike from when I was a little kid to work. Sometime rain, snow whatever.
Then my father was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer and died within 4 months. He was very successful but not the greatest with money. To help my mom pay bills, I sold his car, his vacation home, and had her drop their country club membership.
One day my uncle decided to take me to lunch to discuss my future. I'm actually tearing up about writing this part. He had a contact at a local tech company that had a few openings for customer service reps. I didn't even ask what it paid. I interviewed for it and was hired. It paid 25K and to me that was a ton of money.
5 years later I still work at that company and moved up to an Engineering position after passing certifications. I have a beautiful wife and daughter, and we live in a nice little house.
edit: Thank you all for the comments.
After college I had a horrible time finding a job. I ended up working the front desk at the gym near my parents house for 3 years. I would open the gym at 5am 5 days a week. A lot of the people that came in would be people I knew in high school. Sometimes they would act like they didn't know who I was in order to avoid an awkward situation, which just made it worse. There was a girl that I went to a dance with Sophomore year that would come in every morning. My job is to greet anyone that walks in so the first few times I would say hi "name" and she would swipe her card and completely ignore me. At a certain point my parents stopped helping me with money and I couldn't afford to fill my gas tank. I would ride my old bike from when I was a little kid to work. Sometime rain, snow whatever.
Then my father was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer and died within 4 months. He was very successful but not the greatest with money. To help my mom pay bills, I sold his car, his vacation home, and had her drop their country club membership.
One day my uncle decided to take me to lunch to discuss my future. I'm actually tearing up about writing this part. He had a contact at a local tech company that had a few openings for customer service reps. I didn't even ask what it paid. I interviewed for it and was hired. It paid 25K and to me that was a ton of money.
5 years later I still work at that company and moved up to an Engineering position after passing certifications. I have a beautiful wife and daughter, and we live in a nice little house.
edit: Thank you all for the comments.
30points
#3
I don't like to think you peak once in your lifetime. Life is a series of up and downs, so if you're reading this thinking you've peaked, you can always turn it around.
My friend thinks she peaked in high school, but I'm still holding out hope for her. Yes, she was the top academically, athletically, socially. But what followed was a series of medical conditions, depression, feeling hopeless, losing interest and passion. Some days she feels better, some days she doesn't. And that's okay. I hope one day she can again feel like she is happy.
There are many years left for your life. There are many years to find a new peak. And life is about the journey. Don't give up.
Where's /u/motivatinggiraffe?
Edit: Thanks to whomever touched me with their golden finger! It made my day. I hope the karma passes onto you in real life.
My friend thinks she peaked in high school, but I'm still holding out hope for her. Yes, she was the top academically, athletically, socially. But what followed was a series of medical conditions, depression, feeling hopeless, losing interest and passion. Some days she feels better, some days she doesn't. And that's okay. I hope one day she can again feel like she is happy.
There are many years left for your life. There are many years to find a new peak. And life is about the journey. Don't give up.
Where's /u/motivatinggiraffe?
Edit: Thanks to whomever touched me with their golden finger! It made my day. I hope the karma passes onto you in real life.
28points
It helps to understand that "popularity" is a two-headed beast, and high school is the first place we meet it. Dr. Mitch Prinstein, who literally wrote the book on popularity, breaks it down into two flavors. First, there's "likability," aka nice people, and "status": the quarterbacks, the cheer captains, the Regina Georges of the world. They weren't always nice, but they were powerful, visible, and dominant.
The problem is, our brains get a huge rush from status, and in the small, controlled ecosystem of high school, that feeling is intoxicating. It’s a simple formula: wear the right thing, sit at the right table, and you’re on top. The people who peak in high school are often those who mastered the status game early on, and then spent the rest of their lives trying to play by those same rules. How did that pan out for them?
#4
This is probably going to get lost in the comments, but this isn't me, it's someone I know and this very question just sends tingles up my spine and immediately made me think of him.
He's a family friend, and he was an awesome all-rounded guy. Captain of the football team, President of the debate club, prom king, high school jock, valedictorian. Legitimately the perfect dude you could think of. Looks, money, brains, talent. Dude was made to practically make it big in his high school years. His superlative? Most likely to be successful. His teachers and principle all thought he was going to be a future president of the US.
Unfortunately, he was into w**d heavily. Graduated and went to a school for business. Got kicked out because of possession. That's not all but he started doing hard d***s, whatever he could get his hands on, from what I know. Life went into the hardest spiral downward I've seen. Got into an accident driving drunk against a stone wall, totaled his car, and got a metal brace in place of his femur (I think).
Currently, the dude is in rehab, mentally unstable to talk of anything significant with anyone. Constantly ruins his dad's hard earned reputation, and is treated like a 12 year old. Blows the little money his parents have on getting the next high. Neighbors hate him, community hates him, and still is set on becoming the next president. He's 30 years old, still thinking he's going to run the world. No job, nothing to his name, no qualifications, yet he still thinks he runs the world.
It's so sad to see.
He's a family friend, and he was an awesome all-rounded guy. Captain of the football team, President of the debate club, prom king, high school jock, valedictorian. Legitimately the perfect dude you could think of. Looks, money, brains, talent. Dude was made to practically make it big in his high school years. His superlative? Most likely to be successful. His teachers and principle all thought he was going to be a future president of the US.
Unfortunately, he was into w**d heavily. Graduated and went to a school for business. Got kicked out because of possession. That's not all but he started doing hard d***s, whatever he could get his hands on, from what I know. Life went into the hardest spiral downward I've seen. Got into an accident driving drunk against a stone wall, totaled his car, and got a metal brace in place of his femur (I think).
Currently, the dude is in rehab, mentally unstable to talk of anything significant with anyone. Constantly ruins his dad's hard earned reputation, and is treated like a 12 year old. Blows the little money his parents have on getting the next high. Neighbors hate him, community hates him, and still is set on becoming the next president. He's 30 years old, still thinking he's going to run the world. No job, nothing to his name, no qualifications, yet he still thinks he runs the world.
It's so sad to see.
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23points
#5
Guy I knew had a 4.0 grade score through 4 years of high school. Was given awards, certificates, the whole nine yards. I was one of his connections for c**e and w**d and he would consume tremendous amounts. He went to university right out if HS and lasted three months before he completely burned out. The last time I saw him he lived in a s**t hole trailer on abandoned property in Northern Ontario and drinks constantly.
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22points
#6
All these people complaining about how their 20's/30's have sucked and I'm just sitting here, waiting to peak the first time.
21points
This obsession with status isn't just a personal failing; it's practically an American pastime. Dr. Prinstein points out that our culture has become uniquely fixated on individuating and being "better" than others, a trend that really took off in the '80s. He notes that in other societies, like China, they don't even have a word that truly matches our definition of status-based "popularity."
Social media didn't create this problem, but it might as well be pouring gasoline on the fire. It's the ultimate tool for broadcasting status like your vacations, your job title, your perfect-looking family, to an audience of everyone you've ever met. It’s like a permanent high school reunion where everyone is running for prom king and queen, and the pressure to maintain that "peaked" image becomes a full-time job.
#7
I peaked in high school so hard, that recently I bought a time travel machine. I wanted to go back, but it didn't work. I probably forgot to put in the crystals. If Coach has put me in, we'd have won state.
Now I'm busy babysitting my weird nephews, living out of a van, and selling Tupperware.
How much you want to bet I can throw a football over 'dem mountains?
Now I'm busy babysitting my weird nephews, living out of a van, and selling Tupperware.
How much you want to bet I can throw a football over 'dem mountains?
21points
#8
This sums up my dad and his sisters. High school was as good as it got and they spent all the years following it celebrating graduation day. Everything was about partying, d***s, music, drinking, f*****g, and doing it all again.
Now two of them are dead (both died at 51) and the sole survivor, my aunt, has a weird form of leukemia due to snorting dirty crank.
Not sure what her life expectancy is, but she probably has a decade or so left of partying.
When I talked to any of them all they talked about was the glory days of high school and all the partying and f****d up s**t they did. I always felt like it was sad and felt bad for them. It is hard to describe what a life time of partying, drinking, smoking, and doing d***s does to a person. They look totally worn out and dead inside.
Now two of them are dead (both died at 51) and the sole survivor, my aunt, has a weird form of leukemia due to snorting dirty crank.
Not sure what her life expectancy is, but she probably has a decade or so left of partying.
When I talked to any of them all they talked about was the glory days of high school and all the partying and f****d up s**t they did. I always felt like it was sad and felt bad for them. It is hard to describe what a life time of partying, drinking, smoking, and doing d***s does to a person. They look totally worn out and dead inside.
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19points
#9
Was popular all threw high school. I partied a lot, drank/d***s as often as possible. I had a girlfriend every month. To maintain my popularity, i focused all my time on my appearance and hanging out with people daily. My grades suffered but whatever I was "cool".
I ended up having a kid when I was a senior, grades were to bad to go to college, had a d**g problem, and no one wanted anything to do with me. Oh plus i was a dishwasher at Denny's.
I didnt realize the moment you graduate, no body cares about high school. Luckily now i have a good job and I'm engaged with 2 kids.
I ended up having a kid when I was a senior, grades were to bad to go to college, had a d**g problem, and no one wanted anything to do with me. Oh plus i was a dishwasher at Denny's.
I didnt realize the moment you graduate, no body cares about high school. Luckily now i have a good job and I'm engaged with 2 kids.
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19points
If you're reading this and feeling a cold sweat, here's the good news: life isn't a four-year sprint. As college counselor Sara Harberson explains, it takes a long time to realize our fullest potential. A Gallup study of 1,000 individuals found that nearly 40% of popular kids ended up being less successful after high school, with closer to 25% being set on an upward trajectory.
The whole idea of "peaking" is a myth because it suggests a single high point, after which it's all downhill. Real life is far messier and more interesting than that. It’s the struggles, the disappointments, and the unexpected triumphs that actually build a rich, meaningful existence.
#10
I guess I peaked in high school. Had a ton of friends, popular, great grades, was on a varsity team, met/dated my first girlfriend.
My best friends are still the friends I made in high school. In college and afterwards, I never met anyone as cool/great as them.
I'm kind of lost in life right now. I'm 24, and no idea what I want to do with my life. I miss my best friends. I miss having no responsibility. I miss Fridays after school where we would all pile into one car and take on the world and chase girls and play video games and do nothing.
I miss all that so much.
My best friends are still the friends I made in high school. In college and afterwards, I never met anyone as cool/great as them.
I'm kind of lost in life right now. I'm 24, and no idea what I want to do with my life. I miss my best friends. I miss having no responsibility. I miss Fridays after school where we would all pile into one car and take on the world and chase girls and play video games and do nothing.
I miss all that so much.
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16points
#11
I'm thirty years old and only now getting close to where i was in high school. i was a track star (school records, state championships, eleven varsity letters) and academic standout (voted most likely to get a perfect SAT score, entered college with 52 credit hours from AP classes). i also had a great group of friends and a couple of attractive girlfriends i went back and forth between.
senior year i developed a series of stress fractures that ended my track career. all the ivy league schools that had been recruiting me stopped calling. i reacted by basically giving up on everything. i threw myself whole-heartedly into smoking [substances] all the time and skipping class. while i had the grades and reputation to coast for a while, i had completely used up all my momentum by the time i got to college.
and college really sucked for me. by the time i got there, i was burnt out on anything resembling effort or success, and thought i could maintain the same reputation i had in high school by just sitting around my dorm room getting s****d waiting for my girlfriend to come visit on the weekends. i didn't make friends, didn't go to class, lost my gf and developed crippling anxiety and depression. from there i spent the next five or six years completely embracing mediocrity. dead end jobs. way too much [substances]. no ambition whatsoever.
yada yada yada, self-loathing and the reality of a service industry lifestyle eventually lit a fire under my a*s. went back to school, got a masters degree in applied mathematics, and now have a great job in finance. things are definitely looking up for me, but i still have "don't give up again" written on the top of my bulletin board.
senior year i developed a series of stress fractures that ended my track career. all the ivy league schools that had been recruiting me stopped calling. i reacted by basically giving up on everything. i threw myself whole-heartedly into smoking [substances] all the time and skipping class. while i had the grades and reputation to coast for a while, i had completely used up all my momentum by the time i got to college.
and college really sucked for me. by the time i got there, i was burnt out on anything resembling effort or success, and thought i could maintain the same reputation i had in high school by just sitting around my dorm room getting s****d waiting for my girlfriend to come visit on the weekends. i didn't make friends, didn't go to class, lost my gf and developed crippling anxiety and depression. from there i spent the next five or six years completely embracing mediocrity. dead end jobs. way too much [substances]. no ambition whatsoever.
yada yada yada, self-loathing and the reality of a service industry lifestyle eventually lit a fire under my a*s. went back to school, got a masters degree in applied mathematics, and now have a great job in finance. things are definitely looking up for me, but i still have "don't give up again" written on the top of my bulletin board.
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15points
#12
Hate to do it but this isn't about me.
I graduated four years ago; several months ago my very good platonic friend invited me to a huge benefit dinner for a company he interned for and he had a plus one because he helped plan it. Very fancy, in the city from the suburbs we lived in. On our way there we realize we didn't have any cash so we stop at a Wawa to get some just in case/tips for the bar. We enter the store and the first thing I see is our prom queen and the star quarterback trying to calm down a screaming baby and scrape some money together for there sandwiches. I get being on hard time but they both had track marks and clearly on something.
The quarterback was a complete a*****e to me because I am nerdy and we had several classes together. It was such a divide between the four of us them the popular ones who were in cheap clothes probably trying to find there next high and my friend and I, him in a suit and I in a gown. They didn't recognize us at first but I heard them from an isle over "Is that Royal and friend?!"
A couple weeks later I heard they had there child taken away which sucks as the girl was incredibly nice just didn't have the ability to take care of a child. It really hit home that high school is not the rest of your life.
I graduated four years ago; several months ago my very good platonic friend invited me to a huge benefit dinner for a company he interned for and he had a plus one because he helped plan it. Very fancy, in the city from the suburbs we lived in. On our way there we realize we didn't have any cash so we stop at a Wawa to get some just in case/tips for the bar. We enter the store and the first thing I see is our prom queen and the star quarterback trying to calm down a screaming baby and scrape some money together for there sandwiches. I get being on hard time but they both had track marks and clearly on something.
The quarterback was a complete a*****e to me because I am nerdy and we had several classes together. It was such a divide between the four of us them the popular ones who were in cheap clothes probably trying to find there next high and my friend and I, him in a suit and I in a gown. They didn't recognize us at first but I heard them from an isle over "Is that Royal and friend?!"
A couple weeks later I heard they had there child taken away which sucks as the girl was incredibly nice just didn't have the ability to take care of a child. It really hit home that high school is not the rest of your life.
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15points
So, how do you break free from the glory days loop? Life coach Andrea Lynett insists that feeling "peaked" is just a mindset, and you absolutely have the power to snap out of it. Her advice is refreshingly practical: stop scrolling through your old yearbooks and find a new hobby. Try meditating to get out of your own head. Or, better yet, set small, genuinely attainable goals that get you out of your rut.
The goal isn't to find a new, bigger mountain to conquer immediately. It's about taking that first step off the old one. Learning to bake bread, finishing a 5k, or finally reading that book on your nightstand are all tiny "peaks" that prove your best days are still ahead. It's about building a new identity based on who you are now, not who you were then.
#13
As a 33 year old woman, may I say to you teenagers out there "for f**k's sake stay away from the tanning bed!". Two of the most beautiful girls I went to school with now appear to be beat up leather handbags. They are only in their early 30's kiddos, that s**t will beat you up. Also smoking, you wanna tan and smoke and not look 20 years older than your contemporaries, well too f*****g bad.
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15points
#14
It's epic.
At school I got straight As, was in the 1st XV, athletics captain, was on the the debate team, the chess team, the Bridge team, House Captain, Prefect, got some girls, got some guys, staff loved me, dinner ladies loved me (extra sticky toffee pudding!), other students loved me (some of them) it was great.
Then I went to university and was no longer the smartest kid there. I was no longer the best at everything, and the more I tried to be the more I realised you can't be a jack of all trades.
Then I got a job and realised you need to work really hard to be the best. And I still wanted hobbies and interests and to date and go out, and that's not compatible with being the best at your job.
Then I realised "Boom" you don't need to be the *BEST* at everything. You don't even need to be the BEST at one thing. The world doesn't care, and more importantly your friends and family don't care.
So now I'm coasting thanks to my previous good results, earning a good wage, with a beautiful woman at my side. Maybe I'll make a go of something and be the best again, maybe I won't, maybe I'll divorce at 40, maybe I'll dance the "Funky Chicken" at my 75th wedding anniversary.
At high-school I was the best. Now, I'm just pretty good. And that's okay. In fact, it's epic.
EDIT: The guys who weren't the best at High School are now kicking my a**e in the job stakes. Guys I thought I'd outstrip forever, make me look like I clean toilets for a living by comparison. Props to those guys. I'm jealous of their commitment and their drive and their achievements. I wish it could have been me, but I also like the me I am.
At school I got straight As, was in the 1st XV, athletics captain, was on the the debate team, the chess team, the Bridge team, House Captain, Prefect, got some girls, got some guys, staff loved me, dinner ladies loved me (extra sticky toffee pudding!), other students loved me (some of them) it was great.
Then I went to university and was no longer the smartest kid there. I was no longer the best at everything, and the more I tried to be the more I realised you can't be a jack of all trades.
Then I got a job and realised you need to work really hard to be the best. And I still wanted hobbies and interests and to date and go out, and that's not compatible with being the best at your job.
Then I realised "Boom" you don't need to be the *BEST* at everything. You don't even need to be the BEST at one thing. The world doesn't care, and more importantly your friends and family don't care.
So now I'm coasting thanks to my previous good results, earning a good wage, with a beautiful woman at my side. Maybe I'll make a go of something and be the best again, maybe I won't, maybe I'll divorce at 40, maybe I'll dance the "Funky Chicken" at my 75th wedding anniversary.
At high-school I was the best. Now, I'm just pretty good. And that's okay. In fact, it's epic.
EDIT: The guys who weren't the best at High School are now kicking my a**e in the job stakes. Guys I thought I'd outstrip forever, make me look like I clean toilets for a living by comparison. Props to those guys. I'm jealous of their commitment and their drive and their achievements. I wish it could have been me, but I also like the me I am.
14points
#15
I can't really accurately describe how hopeless I feel knowing that my best years are behind me. Or the anger and self-loathing knowing that I've had so many second chances, and I stepped on every one. The shame. The terror of looking forward from today, and seeing that it's all downhill. Thoughts of s*****e are pretty common. I wouldn't call myself depressed, or serious about the notion, but just an occasional, "Is it really worth sticking around for another fifty years? For [i]this?[/i]"
I don't really know where to start with all of this, so I'll just dive right in. I hate my friends. At best, they are depressing and pathetic. At worst, they are bitter, angry, and hostile. My friends are all of the people from my hometown who found themselves in similar situations: for whatever reason, they didn't go to college, dropped out, or failed out. In other words, we are the losers. One of our favorite hangout spots is the apartment above my buddy's garage. He's 'renovating' it so that he and his girlfriend don't have to live with his parents. It's funny how much of a stereotype it is. But it's not the kind of humor that makes you laugh.
My old friends that went on to be successful 'outgrew' me. One of them graduated college a year early, is going back for his master's, and opened his own business (which is doing very well). Watching him become successful was one of the hardest things I have ever done. He just kinda distanced himself from me until we don't really speak. I hate seeing him, because I can clearly see the pity in his eyes. I'll tell him something good that happened, and he'll say, "Hey man, that's great!" And I know he means it, but it feels patronizing anyway.
Pity isn't exclusive to him. Whenever I see anyone from high school, they all give me that look of pity. My old friends, my old teachers, all of the underclassmen that are going on to college and leaving me behind. It's really s****y knowing that the goofy looking freshman that you used to snicker at when you were a senior is doing better than you. The only ones that really 'get it' are the other burn-outs and losers.
I hate that I'll never be able to experience crazy college parties. I hate feeling so caged. I hate watching all of my friends drive away while my wheels spin in the mud. I hate that I'll spend my life with these cynical, selfish, depressing bastards, and I hate even more that I'm turning into one of them. I hate that I'm so angry all the time. I hate that I'll have very few conversations about politics that don't involve racist slurs. I hate that 'drunk' is the closest I get to happy. I hate that I'm turning into my loser father. I hate that I don't even know where to start changing any of these things. I hate that it's probably too late to try anyway.
I don't really know where to start with all of this, so I'll just dive right in. I hate my friends. At best, they are depressing and pathetic. At worst, they are bitter, angry, and hostile. My friends are all of the people from my hometown who found themselves in similar situations: for whatever reason, they didn't go to college, dropped out, or failed out. In other words, we are the losers. One of our favorite hangout spots is the apartment above my buddy's garage. He's 'renovating' it so that he and his girlfriend don't have to live with his parents. It's funny how much of a stereotype it is. But it's not the kind of humor that makes you laugh.
My old friends that went on to be successful 'outgrew' me. One of them graduated college a year early, is going back for his master's, and opened his own business (which is doing very well). Watching him become successful was one of the hardest things I have ever done. He just kinda distanced himself from me until we don't really speak. I hate seeing him, because I can clearly see the pity in his eyes. I'll tell him something good that happened, and he'll say, "Hey man, that's great!" And I know he means it, but it feels patronizing anyway.
Pity isn't exclusive to him. Whenever I see anyone from high school, they all give me that look of pity. My old friends, my old teachers, all of the underclassmen that are going on to college and leaving me behind. It's really s****y knowing that the goofy looking freshman that you used to snicker at when you were a senior is doing better than you. The only ones that really 'get it' are the other burn-outs and losers.
I hate that I'll never be able to experience crazy college parties. I hate feeling so caged. I hate watching all of my friends drive away while my wheels spin in the mud. I hate that I'll spend my life with these cynical, selfish, depressing bastards, and I hate even more that I'm turning into one of them. I hate that I'm so angry all the time. I hate that I'll have very few conversations about politics that don't involve racist slurs. I hate that 'drunk' is the closest I get to happy. I hate that I'm turning into my loser father. I hate that I don't even know where to start changing any of these things. I hate that it's probably too late to try anyway.
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13points
Ultimately, the most successful people aren't the ones who cling to their high school letterman jacket; they're the ones who recognize it's just one chapter. If Romy and Michele taught us anything, it's that the ultimate power move is to simply stop caring what the "A-Group" thinks. The entire charade of trying to impress former bullies and classmates is a game you can only win by refusing to play.
True success isn't about inventing Post-it notes or crafting the perfect lie to prove you've "made it." It’s about having the confidence to do your own weird, wonderful dance without needing an audience of ghosts from your past to approve. Your story is still being written, and the best plot twists are almost certainly yet to come.
#16
Private school in Germany: Most of the popular kids went into economics. One of them keeps making startups and selling them.
High school in rural Florida: One of them just finished some kinda dental school type undergrad. Happy for her. Most of the popular girls went on to become mums primarily; even the smart but slightly awkward one got her degree and then became a full-time mother.
Sixthform in England: One guy keeps going on trains without tickets and getting caught; he's also some sort of EDL type now. One girl graduated from uni a few days ago and is hosting entrepreneurship workshops. One is doing psychology at the same university I went to.
High school in rural Florida: One of them just finished some kinda dental school type undergrad. Happy for her. Most of the popular girls went on to become mums primarily; even the smart but slightly awkward one got her degree and then became a full-time mother.
Sixthform in England: One guy keeps going on trains without tickets and getting caught; he's also some sort of EDL type now. One girl graduated from uni a few days ago and is hosting entrepreneurship workshops. One is doing psychology at the same university I went to.
13points
#17
I may have peaked in HS. Not quite sure.
I was pretty f*****g popular. Had a girlfriend always, but more importantly, people wanted to hang with me and be my friend. I always had plans, I always had a smattering of people to do something with and a variety of potential plans every weekend.
Then came college. I went to a school I didn't really like, made some friends but never had a close-knit crew. Study abroad was the best semester I ever had, and I still keep in touch with many of those people, but don't see them as we're spread across the US now and getting older (I am 29).
I have a great girlfriend, we will very likely get married and have been together a long while. So I don't get bummed over not being able to get girls, but prior to her, it was pretty rough and inconsistent after high school. But the real reason I feel I peaked is that I just don't have friends and can't make them. My girlfriend's friends from college are all great. We get along and like each other. But they never call me. I never call them. We converse but don't get close. But that is my most frequented social scene, I think. I have issues with work (2 weeks unemployed right now, the bottom of my job essentially fell out but thats for another thread) and even when I was working, it wasn't a job that provided me with much of a social outlet.
I don't know that I've peaked. Certainly I have a lot going for me and I am happy. But I used to be popular, make and keep friends, have things to do, be invited places, and feel like people wanted to spend time with me. Therefore I would spend time with people. Now, despite having some friends - really great ones too - I just feel lonely and uncool. And excluded. I feel (and thanks to social media, know) that the people who I do spend time with are often doing fun things and getting together and not even thinking of inviting or getting in touch with me. And I can't bring myself to pathetically invite myself along all the time. Is that what peaking is?
I was pretty f*****g popular. Had a girlfriend always, but more importantly, people wanted to hang with me and be my friend. I always had plans, I always had a smattering of people to do something with and a variety of potential plans every weekend.
Then came college. I went to a school I didn't really like, made some friends but never had a close-knit crew. Study abroad was the best semester I ever had, and I still keep in touch with many of those people, but don't see them as we're spread across the US now and getting older (I am 29).
I have a great girlfriend, we will very likely get married and have been together a long while. So I don't get bummed over not being able to get girls, but prior to her, it was pretty rough and inconsistent after high school. But the real reason I feel I peaked is that I just don't have friends and can't make them. My girlfriend's friends from college are all great. We get along and like each other. But they never call me. I never call them. We converse but don't get close. But that is my most frequented social scene, I think. I have issues with work (2 weeks unemployed right now, the bottom of my job essentially fell out but thats for another thread) and even when I was working, it wasn't a job that provided me with much of a social outlet.
I don't know that I've peaked. Certainly I have a lot going for me and I am happy. But I used to be popular, make and keep friends, have things to do, be invited places, and feel like people wanted to spend time with me. Therefore I would spend time with people. Now, despite having some friends - really great ones too - I just feel lonely and uncool. And excluded. I feel (and thanks to social media, know) that the people who I do spend time with are often doing fun things and getting together and not even thinking of inviting or getting in touch with me. And I can't bring myself to pathetically invite myself along all the time. Is that what peaking is?
12points
#18
Just saw them last night at my local bar, they're playing billiards and drinking $2 Yuenglings while listening to Sublime.
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12points
#19
I always joke to my friends that I peaked too early and in high school.
Not to humblebrag but I was friends with kids in every year, almost all my teachers loved me, I had a 4.0, won Mr. North (my HS name). Even in my yearbook I had to add an additional 6 pages because there wasn't enough space for people to write/sign mine. I could literally pick and choose between the girls that wanted to date/hookup with because there were enough that wanted me.
Since then, I was an average student in college, had a decent amount of friends and settled into my first long term relationship (after a few failed attempts). I joined a fraternity and no more sports. During college, I was diagnosed with bipolar and that's something that I had to really learn to deal with. After graduation, got a decent job as a social worker but I love it and I love what I do and I love my life.
I definitely have fewer friends, but that was partially by choice. Growing older, I learned that it's literally impossible to have as many friends as I did in HS and it's just too much effort and not worth it. I have fewer friends but they are of better quality and I'm glad that's how it is.
It seems that life isn't as exciting, but I enjoy it just as much because there's a point where the Bruce Wayne/homecoming king lifestyle suddenly stops becoming fulfilling. Yea it can bring temporary happiness but I really had to take a look at my life as a whole and what I wanted to do with it. My life isn't terrible, per se, but it's certainly fairly average compared to the HS celebrity status.
Not to humblebrag but I was friends with kids in every year, almost all my teachers loved me, I had a 4.0, won Mr. North (my HS name). Even in my yearbook I had to add an additional 6 pages because there wasn't enough space for people to write/sign mine. I could literally pick and choose between the girls that wanted to date/hookup with because there were enough that wanted me.
Since then, I was an average student in college, had a decent amount of friends and settled into my first long term relationship (after a few failed attempts). I joined a fraternity and no more sports. During college, I was diagnosed with bipolar and that's something that I had to really learn to deal with. After graduation, got a decent job as a social worker but I love it and I love what I do and I love my life.
I definitely have fewer friends, but that was partially by choice. Growing older, I learned that it's literally impossible to have as many friends as I did in HS and it's just too much effort and not worth it. I have fewer friends but they are of better quality and I'm glad that's how it is.
It seems that life isn't as exciting, but I enjoy it just as much because there's a point where the Bruce Wayne/homecoming king lifestyle suddenly stops becoming fulfilling. Yea it can bring temporary happiness but I really had to take a look at my life as a whole and what I wanted to do with it. My life isn't terrible, per se, but it's certainly fairly average compared to the HS celebrity status.
11points
#20
Alright, considering there are only two comments and nobody has actual posted a story yet, here is one about my uncle.
In high school he was extremely popular, football star and captain. Apparently he could get any girl and was a smooth talker. He got into d***s shortly after graduating (this is in the 70s) and quickly flunked out of college. He continued his party lifestyle in till it ran him into the ground.
Now, he is pretty much mentally handicapped and can hardly have a conversation for more than 5 minutes. My whole family sees him as a burden and tries to ignore him as much as possible.
It's sad because he is such a nice person and wants everyone to be happy. He got the idea that people don't want him around, so he lives alone and keeps to himself. I only ever see him at Christmas so I always make it a point to include him and talk to him. I will call him on occasion and it always make his day. It's a sad lonely life, but he never got the support or help he needed
Edit: thanks for all the kind words! I am going to call him today after work and see how he is doing, I'm sure that will make his day.
In high school he was extremely popular, football star and captain. Apparently he could get any girl and was a smooth talker. He got into d***s shortly after graduating (this is in the 70s) and quickly flunked out of college. He continued his party lifestyle in till it ran him into the ground.
Now, he is pretty much mentally handicapped and can hardly have a conversation for more than 5 minutes. My whole family sees him as a burden and tries to ignore him as much as possible.
It's sad because he is such a nice person and wants everyone to be happy. He got the idea that people don't want him around, so he lives alone and keeps to himself. I only ever see him at Christmas so I always make it a point to include him and talk to him. I will call him on occasion and it always make his day. It's a sad lonely life, but he never got the support or help he needed
Edit: thanks for all the kind words! I am going to call him today after work and see how he is doing, I'm sure that will make his day.
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9points