"So What Will You Do? Fire Me?": 35 People Share Their Most Absurd Resignation Stories

I was an operations manager at my last place, but pretty much just a pa/general manager to the business owner.

I called to let him know I had a great job offer and I'd be leaving, he said "I get it's a great offer, but what happens if I don't accept your resignation?". He absolutely thought I wouldn't be able to leave. We had a brief conversation about slavery.

I was working a job with a hybrid schedule, 3 days in office, 2 at home. At home days were Tuesday and Wednesday because they didn't want me "having a long weekend." Literally makes no sense, but sure.

Well, the place was already toxic as f*ck. Boss was writing me up for anything. Owner was demanding that I keep my lights on in my office even after I complained of eye strain. His excuse was that he "couldn't tell if I was there." When I filed FMLA, HR told my boss and the owner all the details, and they weaponized it. You know, all the fun things.

Finally, the parent company that bought us sees no use for the now ex owner and my boss and tells them when their last day will be. My new manager comes on board and it was end of December. I wanted to travel back home for family, but was a few hours of PTO short to request the full 2 weeks off I wanted. Now, the company gave us several days off for the holiday, so it came down to it that those last 2 weeks of December only equated to something like 6 or 7 days of work. I work from home 2 days a week, so there was really only a need for 3 days of in office time. I had enough PTO to cover one day, so I ask if they can just give me some grace, and let me work remote, from my hometown, for the whole 6 days.

Absolutely not. "It sets a precedence." We NEED you in the office those 2 days. And so on.

So I quit with 8 hour notice. My manager calls me and asks why and I told her, "if you can't give me 2 days, why should I give you two weeks?"

I walked out on a job once (a high-level one) and all the partners called to threaten me that I had signed an NDA (I hadn't) and that I had a non-compete (nope), so I needed to come back because I wasn't allowed to work anywhere else.

Nothing like making an employee even happier about their decision to leave!

I submitted my 2 weeks notice at a dumpster fire of a job and the company seemingly accepted it. Then, at 4:30, security came up to me and walked me out of the front door, barely giving me enough time to grab my few things. No problem as I called my new job and told them that I could start a week earlier and took a week off. During that week I received a call from the old company about some procedures that I was supposed to be working on. I was incredulous but professional and told them where they were stored on the network. A few hours later I received another phone call asking me why the work wasn't completed. I stated that I was planning to finish them during my final two weeks but got walked out of the building. My old supervisor got on the phone and asked me to please consider finishing the work. After having a good laugh together I wished him a good day and hung up the phone.

My old HR dept tried to do something similar.

I gave my boss ample notice (out of professional courtesy) that I was planning on leaving, and then put in official notice 30 days before. HR came back to me and said I ‘need to agree my final day with my management and get them to sign forms saying they agree to it, if they don’t then I can’t have that day as my final day’

“No.”

“But it’s our policy”

“But it’s not mine, you deal with it”

“I…uhhh…we’re not sure if you can do that”

My old boss also tried this. I very much enjoyed the look on his face when I said It’s irrelevant to me what you want my last day is Friday, but I’m happy to take my sick days starting now if you’re unhappy with my date because you are certainly making me ill. This is the same guy that when I asked for a raise said do you really do this work for the paycheck. Yes sir. I do.

Last company (investment advisory in US) told me that I wasn’t allowed to resign. They attempted to tell my clients I was “being promoted to a non client facing position” and that if I didn’t play ball I would get terminated for insubordination.

Record your phone calls and print your emails folks. These fools are paying dearly for their nonsense. My clients and I are happy at a new company and prior firm is under SEC investigation

Reminds me of a time I worked for a sh**hole company and the guy firing me said he needed me to sign a paper acknowledging we had the termination discussion. I told him I wasn’t signing anything to which he said “you HAVE to!” I’m like, so what will you do if I don’t??? FIRE ME?

Really sucks when companies feel the need to place blame on the person being fired rather than on sh**ty management.

I once had an HR director tell me he didnt accept my resignation, i just laughed and walked out.

My wife gave a 3 day notice at a job back in the 90's. Her boss became verbally abusive, screaming and cussing at her. Then he told her that she could not give a 3 day notice. She said, "You're right, I quit now."

I quit my job on Friday and they nearly sh*t themselves when I gave them two weeks. My boss begged me to reconsider and told me how disappointed he is, that they are hiring more staff and it will get better. Its been 8 months of me backfilling a senior role that I am not remotely qualified for while still doing my actual job, for the same money. Dumpster fire is the best way to describe their management style. I looked my boss in the eye and said,

"I want to get off the ride now."

He backed off after that.

I was let go when our marketing department "restructured" HR: We need to to stay on board for 6 weeks to transfer files to the new design agency platform and finish special requests." ME: No thank you. I'll clean my desk out today.

When I was much younger, I had reached my limit with my immediate supervisor. I told him I quit. He said “Is that your 2 week notice?” I said “F*ck no! It’s my 2 minute warning!” Tossed my keys on his desk, grabbed my tool box and walked the f*ck out.

Just quit my job at a hospital to move to a better paying one at another hospital. Incompetent management with giant egos tore my old department apart, which is unfortunate cause I really enjoyed working for/with the people in place before they guts all of our upper management. So I put in my two weeks and proceeded to burn through all my sick time and covid bank until my last day. The icing on the cake, when I called out on my last day I asked when my vacation pay out check would be arriving. Felt good man.

Always try to burn through your PTO and sick time before leaving, you worked for those hours and deserve to use them.

My first job was at a cafe/bakery that got bought out by some coffee chain. They moved the shop to a new larger location and everything was redone in the new branding. As I was the only one who was kept from the old store, they made me the closing lead. After a few months of the progressively worse working conditions I was already fed up. One day as the boss was leaving he tells me the store had to be absolutely perfect because they were having a shareholder meeting in the store the next morning. That night was extremely busy as we were the only coffee shop around and were near a college. We had customers until closing and were to busy to get any cleaning done. As soon as we closed, the two other people I was working with clocked out and left while I was cleaning the restroom. When I discovered they had left and I was stuck doing everything myself I was done. I pulled the register tills and put them in the safe, made sure the store was locked up then I printed up the companies resignation form, signed it, and left. I returned my keys when I picked up my paycheck.

One of the owners later told me that when she walked in she knew I had quit. It was a mess and they had to deal with it, fort6the manager and district manager had to help as well. When I picked up my final paycheck and returned my keys, the boss smiled at me and said he didnt blame me one bit.

I had something similar happen. Resigned, let them know I'd be leaving on x day in 2 weeks. A boss and HR lady tried to tell me I needed to stay for at least a month to help the transition and I said no, I start my new job the day after my last day here. They tried to tell me they "never agreed" to my resignation date and "set me a new one" for the end of the month. I wasn't particularly hurting for money at the time and didn't have anybody depending on me for the health insurance id lose for those two weeks, so I just said f*ck it and bounced after they went back to their office, lol. After the fact I was actually kind of happy they did that; I would've happily given them 2 weeks of my time as a courtesy, but instead they made me realize how much i deserved a two week vacation camping and drinking with my buds.

I worked for a PT clinic for about 4 years as an Office Manager. Absolutely loved my job and the people I worked with, but the insurance benefits were complete garbage and not worth the premiums. So I ended up with insurance through the marketplace for the first 2 years of my job. At my 2 year review, the owner of the clinic asked what it would take to keep me there long term, and I told him my misgivings with his offered insurance plan and said I would stay for life if he made this one adjustment. Well year 3 goes by and no change to the insurance plans even after discussing options with him multiple times. By the time year 4 passes, I'm done. I'm over it. I've gone above and beyond for this job and the owner wont give me the one thing I need to stay happy in that position. I finally find a new job and gave him my resignation with a 2 week notice. 1 week before my last day he holds an impromptu meeting with all of his employees (myself not included but I was in the room only feet away), and he proceeds to hand out $2500 bonus checks to all of the employees except for myself. He then says as he's passing these checks out that these are "A thank you during this difficult time of transition, and that loyalty is rewarded." I packed up my stuff and walked out that day. So glad I quite that place.

I quit my job of 14 years with zero notice once I finally had enough of them making every aspect of the work a nightmare.

Went in at the beginning of my shift, put my key on my manager's desk, said "I quit" and walked out.

About 90 minutes later the rancid b**ch actually texted me to say I needed to make a formal resignation.

Get f*cked, you useless sh*t heap. I don't take my orders from you any more.

Exact same thing happened to me last week. I gave my 2 weeks notice and my boss was like "Oh, I can't accept this, someone's already out on maternity leave and we'll be too short staffed." So then they got zero weeks notice because i just kinda...left.

A guy who has a similar job as me had an employee give two weeks notice. More time is always nicer but zero is required and 2 weeks is customary in my Industry.

Anyway the other boss freaked out, called me up super pissed about how "unprofessional" it was. I reminded him that he once fired a guy with no notice at all. It was a serious reason but still: if you can fire someone instantly they can quit instantly.

The knife cuts both ways.